tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-91398294286067841242024-03-05T07:13:08.080-08:00Our Journey in Him<br>
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All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full.<br>
To the place the streams come from, there they return again.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comBlogger99125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-32632049741161136952014-04-02T06:00:00.000-07:002014-04-02T06:00:00.984-07:00obedience is not a requirement…………it’s a response….<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i’ve realized that i was measuring God’s acceptance of me by
how He provides for me……..and in turn i believed that my obedience resulted in
rewards from Him…….i believed that the good that happened in my life was proof
that I am a child of God……<br />
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but that is not truth………</div>
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and it was not bringing me freedom…………</div>
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you can be set free from chains that bind you, but you still
need to learn the habit of walking in freedom……..when you walk <b><i>in freedom</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> that’s when you bear the fruits
of freedom………He plants a seed, waters it and it grows………His work, not yours….. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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you can receive freedom and still be walking in unbelief in the unlocked areas of your heart…..i find that it’s a process this renewing of your
mind…….it takes time…..and that’s ok……</div>
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over the past three months i’ve had an underlying feeling of
detachment……and i couldn’t pinpoint the reason for it………sometimes it can take a
while for me to realize that i have painted myself into a corner by what i
believe……..sometimes it can take some time for my eyes to open up to a new
truth…..and that’s ok too……..</div>
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<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/11/shifting-gears.html" target="_blank">we’ve paid off our credit card debt</a>……He said we owe Him
nothing and i still didn’t get it……even though He was the One to give us the
wisdom, to show us what to do to get rid of it…..i was still believing that if <b><i>i</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> was obedient, if </span><b><i>i</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> did what He said, looked after
what He gave me…….then </span><b><i>i</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> would be rewarded and that those rewards were proof that i
am His child………and so when i stretched the money in the bank account to it’s
very limit to make it to the end of the month, when the food in the cupboard
was running out and I wisely planned meals to eat for the last week of the
month……i thought i would be rewarded for my obedience…..for my good
stewardship…….we made it through january without using our credit card……we
pushed through February, celebrating the kid’s birthdays with money i had earned
through work (work He provided) and when the end of march loomed before me i
knew it would be another tight squeeze…… i began to feel despondent…….what was
wrong? why could we not break free from this cycle of (seemingly) never having
enough?</span></div>
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He never leaves you in that corner…….He might just let you
get there though for a reason……..you need to come to the end of yourself, trust
me it’s better that way…..it’s better to have the lies unveiled and the truth
revealed, it’s better to realize that it’s His strength that you can rely on,
and not your own……..yes, you can be wise-but that’s a gift from Him anyway-and
you can manage well what you own-those were His gift’s too if you really admit
the truth…………it is better for Him to come alongside you gently like the Big
Daddy He is………the One who just wants you to come to Him for advice, asking Him
which is the<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/09/trust-in-lord-with-all-your-heart.html" target="_blank"> best path</a>? the best decision to make?………..so when i finally turned to Him, ranting and raving like the child i can be sometimes (i’m still
growing in Him, you know?) when i finally dared to ask: why are You not
providing all that <b><i>i </i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">need (want)? He whispered I am……..</span></div>
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<b><i>this</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> is what you need: you need to realize that it wasn’t
because of </span><b><i>your obedience</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> to follow my wisdom that I paid off your debt, provided you
with a new car, gave you extra work……….it was because of </span><b><i>His</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> obedience…….it was because He lay
down His life obediently that you never need to prove you are obedient to
Me…….I give to you not because of </span><b><i>your love</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> for Me, but because of </span><b><i>My
Love</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> for you……..so
stop, stop believing that you need to be obedient to be rewarded by Me…….you
have already received your reward…..He is seated in heaven…….and all that He
is, all that He has is your inheritance……..<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/mondays-arent-so-blue-anymore.html" target="_blank">your crown of glory</a>…….I am your Pappa, come to Me not asking for a yes or no (and
by the way, most of the time you’re expecting a no)………come to Me asking for My
advice, I </span><b><i>want</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> to give it to you…….you have dreams, I want you to live them and I
know the best timing for them, I have the best way for them to come
about………come to Me and I will carry your burdens……</span></div>
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i know <b><i>this</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">:God provides!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>we’ve walked through (almost) empty cupboards, empty petrol tanks, money
running low before month end, a broken down car which drained our supplies and
left me without transport for the kids…………and yet we survived because He always
provided what we needed in the right timing………going through all of that, i
heard Him whisper: you will always have enough……..and there always has been……so
I know this time of strengthening has it’s purpose……to break more of those
weaker links in the chain of lies that hold me back from walking in the fullness of Christ…….</span></div>
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this is where i am now:in my Pappa’s arms…..resting,
knowing, believing that <b><i>i</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> don’t need to prove anything to receive from Him…….and
waiting, patiently (well, sometimes) for Him to reveal more of what i </span><b><i>have</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> received in Him………the One who
knows my needs before i have even asked for them and has promised to provide
without any payment from me……….obedience is not a requirement…….it is a
response to His Love poured out to me, because He loved me first and He always
knows what’s best for me………Godliness with contentment is my desire…….</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-91390643764893929522014-01-21T01:18:00.000-08:002014-01-21T01:28:13.955-08:00when dreams come true...........<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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if you've been visiting this blog over the past few years you may have read <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/06/there-once-was-little-girl-who-wanted.html" target="_blank">this post </a>: about my little ballerina girl's visit to uct dance school.................</div>
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which was later followed by<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/07/night-out-at-ballet.html" target="_blank"> this one</a> after our first night out at the ballet</div>
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and a centre stage photograph of an awestruck little ballerina .....</div>
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reading over those two posts today has brought tears to my eyes........not only because of the special memories which were shared, but because it is becoming so real to me just how much my Father loves me and wants to fulfill all of my dreams.............three years ago when Jen stood on that stage i thought: one day you could be on that stage as a dancer and not just a member of the audience, i hope that your dreams come true little one.........<br />
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in february this year this will be a desire of our hearts (both hers and mine) that the Lord will have choreographed for her........and not only does she get to dance on that stage-like a real ballerina-she also gets <b>the</b> <b>white tutu and tiara</b> she has always dreamt about! the Lord is so good!!!<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Matthew 19:14 Jesus said, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."</span></i></b><br />
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i am encouraged by this: if my Daddy would go to the ends of the earth to make a little ballerina's dreams come true-down to the very last details!!!!- then i know He will do this for me too.......i believe that the kingdom of heaven and <b><i>all </i></b>of it's treasures can be received by all...........Father help me to be child-like in my acceptance of Your Love, let nothing hinder me from coming to You knowing that You know all of the desires of my heart and that You promise to meet my every need!!!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-16668664961994792902014-01-01T11:33:00.000-08:002014-01-06T00:28:06.407-08:00stepping forward into me...........<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
so last year was the year i discovered that it's ok to be me..........it's ok to be intense, introverted, passionate me............<br />
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it's ok to need time to be alone <b><i>without</i></b> my kids, <b><i>without</i></b> my husband, <b><i>without</i></b> friends........<br />
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it's ok to want time to read.......<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/mondays-arent-so-blue-anymore.html" target="_blank">walk on the beach alone</a>.......write things down so that i can process them........it's ok to be with just me......<br />
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and although being alone is important to me, i've also discovered that i can <b><i>never be alone</i></b> for too long......very soon i will want time with others to share deeply, to pour out what is in my heart, processing what i am going through........<br />
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<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/his-grace-covers-multitude-of-sins.html" target="_blank">i've learnt that mistakes are not failures</a>, but rather that they are stepping stones.......so i keep moving forward believing that He that is within me is greater than He that is in the world, and i know that i will <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/youre-not-despicable-2-me.html" target="_blank">always be seen as He sees me</a>: an overcomer.........His perfect bride........<br />
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and it has been in this alone time..........this season that felt like isolation at first, but turned into freedom from chains that bound me, that i have discovered that freedom comes from daily forgiving and accepting forgiveness.......from daily living in the truth that He came to set me free from laws that had bound me so tightly, from a need to prove my worthiness to others........seeking acceptance from the world has never brought me lasting peace or joy-there has always been something more to prove.........seeking, and finding acceptance from the One that sees me as righteous and crowns me with His (seemingly undeserved) glory has brought me more freedom than the world offers me.........<br />
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so i am stepping forward into this new year, trusting that the Prince of Peace goes with me, having discovered that it's ok to be me because being me is more pleasing to Him than when i try to be like others...........having experienced His love, peace, provision, peace and joy like never before in 2013 i am stepping forward and moving with Him as one into this new year..........<br />
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2014 i look forward to traveling through you...........for i know that i will <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/09/replacing-old-with-new.html" target="_blank">never be alone</a> in any storm, valley or mountain top........and where the wind blows, i pray, that by His grace, i will follow.............<br />
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(you may not be a katy perry fan.......but this song has me roaring when it comes on the radio ;-)<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-19901602004854007922014-01-01T11:11:00.000-08:002014-02-17T22:40:06.636-08:00i'm beginning to discover who I AM.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b><i>(ooooops, not sure what i've done here but this is an old post that just got republished apparently)</i></b><br />
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around about two years ago i went through a period of trying to figure out what to do as a hobby.....the world was telling me-you're supposed to have interests......something to keep you busy other than your children......you're supposed to know who you are and what you enjoy........i tried pottery and then sewing, thought about starting to dance again but joined a pilates class instead.........but nothing seemed like it was for me........<br />
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a year later i joined a craft group with some friends.......every month we'd learn a new craft......what i confirmed about myself was: if something doesn't have a purpose then i didn't really want to do it....so, for example, when i learnt to crochet i had to do something with that skill-make a blanket for jen......what i struggled with the most after these craft evenings was the reality that i didn't have the same enthusiasm for crafting as my friends........i wasn't the same........it wasn't that i couldn't do those things:i could........i just didn't want to......<br />
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the comparison game is a killer.........you feel like you don't fit in, like you're not good enough......not the mom, wife or woman you're supposed to be.........<br />
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i used to fall into the comparison trap often.........<br />
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the Lord had starting highlighting this fact for me (again) as we were going through the transition from home schooling to schooling........He is a great farmer-pulling out the biggest weeds which want to choke the life out of us, allowing the true seeds to grow so that we can reap a good harvest.........for me the biggest weed was: i'm.not.good.enough.<br />
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He showed me how, as a teacher, i had never believed in my ability to be a good teacher.......i was always asking others: what do you use? how do you teach that? when i was grade head i thought that if i wasn't teaching the same as my colleagues then i wouldn't be teaching my class as well as them......at both of my teaching posts i taught with two very experienced teacher's.......the last of which was the most challenging........i was the young one with five years of teaching experience trying to lead a creative out-of-the-box-teacher with twenty plus years experience and my phase head.......i was the grade head who found her security in doing things by the book to feel successful in her teaching........we were a ticking time bomb and i felt like i bore the brunt of it in year end evaluations............it was only in my last year that i realised the only way to lead was to combine our strengths to overcome our individual weaknesses........by the end of my five years there i had finally come to realise that we were all individuals doing the same work in our own way producing good results.........apparently they must have thought that too....in my final year i was selected as one of the top teachers on the staff.............but i didn't believe it.........<br />
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when jen started at school it was like starting our lives all over again.......both our kids had grown up in the home school community........barring one other family at fellowship-all of their friends were home schoolers.......one of the first things i noticed was: we're on our own and the comparison game wasn't being played.........i had no-one to compare myself to.........school moms don't often stand around chatting about how to parent or school their children at the end of the day........and it was going to take some time to make friends.......<br />
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in the last year of having the kids at home with me i had also learnt that there were questions to avoid if you wanted to stop playing the comparison game: how do you do that? what would you do? what do you use? these were all questions that set me up either as the one that felt good as a parent/mom/wife or resulted in me feeling like a failure in those very same areas.........<br />
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the Lord is good-i have no doubt about that-when He removes weeds of unbelief, He plants new seeds of truth and if we allow Him to water those seeds, if we believe the truth about ourselves we'll find ourselves growing stronger........<br />
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it felt like i had no-one else to lean on or share my experiences with in those early days of jen going to school........i kept on reminding myself that the Father had <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/09/trust-in-lord-with-all-your-heart.html" target="_blank">promised to lead us on paths of righteousness</a>, that He had promised that He would never leave us and He hasn't..........i could tell you of the many times that He has met our needs, how He has comforted and given wisdom........i could tell you about the times i doubted what we were doing and wrestled with Him for answers........but what i really want to tell you today is how He has set me free from the comparison game to begin discovering who I AM........<br />
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late one night i sat listening to a teaching by bertie britz........he's a south african believer who has an amazing revelation of God's love and purpose for our lives.........i'm not even sure now which teaching it was, but i know the effect it had on me.......over all of those years when the Father had been <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/draw-near-to-me-for-ill-draw-near-to-you.html" target="_blank">drawing me closer, trying to show me who He was</a>, i had been believing a lie..........i believed that i was a christian because i had chosen to follow Jesus...........i believed that i had chosen to follow Him and therefore that i loved Him.......but i didn't believe that He loved me............that night He told me that He had been planting seeds all of my life........sometimes I chose to believe them and His Spirit could water them and help them to grow.........but most of the time i let the world tell me what to believe about myself and those weeds would often grow up and throttle the truth that He had revealed to me..........He told me that all of my life He had loved me-thought of me and desired me even before i was knit together in my mother's womb.............all my life He had persued me, He thought that i would make a perfect bride for Him..........all that He was asking was for me to believe that He loves me..........when i realised that it wasn't because i had chosen to follow Him, but rather that all i needed to do was to believe that He loves me....when i realised that truth, He whispered: if you can believe that i love you just the way you are, that is all i want from you...........now we can become one........bride and bridegroom......you don't need to be a follower, walk beside me and just believe..........<br />
<br />
pretty soon after that experience i made the decision to put jen into school...........walking down that path, which i had thought i wouldn't take, i knew that i could trust My Father to be with me.......i knew Jesus was with me and that He had chosen me as His bride.........i feel like now is the time to learn about what He has put within me.......His Spirit........often, in the past two years, it felt like i was giving up who i was but when i finally stopped wrestling i would see that He was just trying to show me who He was.......My Protector, My Wisdom, My Provider, My Shepherd, My Best Friend.........He was showing me just how much He loves me.........that night, almost two years ago, He had planted the seed of truth in my heart and ever since He has been watering it and growing my knowledge of His love for me......<br />
<br />
i've realised now that i was in a place of isolation for good reasons.........a place where the opportunity for comparison didn't arise as often as before.............a place where i could really begin to discover who I AM and to grow strong in Him........once i had believed that the Father loved me just as i am i could begin to trust Him more too.........so when things around me look like they don't make sense, i'm trusting that He is control and that He knows what He is doing..........after all He's had me in His thoughts since the beginning of time.....<br />
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i love to be out in creation with my family, climbing mountains together.....</div>
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reaching the highest points seems tough sometimes..........</div>
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but i thoroughly enjoy the views from the top of the mountains we have overcome, together</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-10648799691140760452013-11-03T11:07:00.000-08:002013-11-03T11:07:57.768-08:00shifting gears.............<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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my first car was a manual (gear-stick)…….i bought it
straight out of the box with money i had earned from my first teaching post………i was proud of my little white mazda midge, she wasn’t fancy, but she was mine and i had worked hard for her……<br />
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when i married ray he owned a bmw……..although i loved having
him drive me around i wasn’t a fancy car person and i wasn’t really keen
on driving it…….my thought process at the time was: give me a car which i can
feel that i am in control of –when i turned the steering wheel it felt like i knew exactly where it was going to…..so i drove my car and he drove his…….</div>
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before mike was born ray traded in his manual bmw for an
automatic……..and i still didn’t want to drive it………it was big and if i drove
something that was an automatic <b><i>with </i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">power steering i was definitely not going to feel
like i was in control of that car!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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and then my mazda midge was stolen………and insurance wouldn’t
pay out because, well, i couldn’t lie…….i had parked it outside the hairdresser
and my porridge brain couldn’t quite remember if i had locked the doors or
not…….so the law-abiding christian that i was believed that i had to tell the
truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God…….mr. insurance
man, i really can’t tell you if i locked those doors or not……..i believed i was
doing the right thing.....<o:p></o:p></div>
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in the Father’s infinite grace and mercy He provided us with
a new car-we couldn’t pay for it though-ray’s father covered the costs…….<o:p></o:p></div>
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i’ll be honest with you, it was <b><i>not</i></b> my favourite car, but i was thankful for it……..it
was an opel and it felt like it had <b><i>the </i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">heaviest steering-wheel in the history of </span><b><i>all</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> cars……when you turned the wheel
it felt like you were moving a mountain……..for the first time ever i was </span><b><i>not</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> enjoying being in control of </span><b><i>my
car</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">.........<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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ray offered for me to drive the<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> bmw</span> and i will admit, that i hesitated……..me, drive an
automatic? i’ve never done that before!!!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> b</span>ut i eventually gave in and learnt how to drive an automatic…….and i even discovered that
having to drive a car which didn’t need me to change the gears was actually
quite a liberating drive………and the best part about an automatic? it’s
absolutely awesome to do hill starts in (no hand-break and clutch control
needed!!!).....rolling back on those fish hoek hills was not part of my nightmares anymore!<o:p></o:p></div>
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and then God stepped in……..we were doing some building work
on our home and the builder offered us cash for the opel…….we hadn’t even
mentioned to him about selling it…….ray had been considering buying a motorbike
but he hadn’t made a decision yet…….however, we felt it was what we should
do……..so we stepped out in faith, believing it was the Lord’s will….we sold the opel, leaving us with only an automatic again.......<o:p></o:p></div>
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so there i was learning to drive an automatic and eventually learning to love it!!! (shhhh,
don’t tell ray ok?!)<o:p></o:p></div>
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fast forward a few years, the bmw was starting to give us <b><i>lots
</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">of trouble……the air
conditioner broke, the radio wasn’t working, the electronics of the car was
starting to give up…….and then about a year ago ray was driving home from
fellowship and the differential housing fell apart, literally leaving the nuts
and bolts of the car lying in the road like in one of those old cartoons where you see the car falling apart and the nuts and bolts go flying everywhere………we were unable to drive the car……at
that time fixing the car would cost us less than buying a new one………we were
heavily in debt already and couldn’t possibly see our way to purchasing a new
car………at that point in time we were on a very new learning curve of<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>how our Father wants to provide for us,
although we<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>weren’t ready to go
forward in faith to buy a new car, what i did feel was peace about the fact
that i didn’t need to worry about how i would get the kids to school on Monday,
or the following week for that matter-i had felt the Lord say that </span><b><i>that</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"> would be taken care of, and it
was! He led us gently by the hand…….baby steps ;-)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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over the past two years, through His gentle guidance, Our
Father has led us to get rid of the debt we were in (i hope to share that story
with you one day)……..but we thought we were still in <b><i>no</i></b> position to purchase a
new car………but God’s thoughts are not our thoughts, His ways are not our ways as
today i can joyfully shout to the world: our God provides way beyond my
dreams!!! we have a new car! and it’s not an <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;"> </span><b style="font-style: italic;">automatic, </b>but it's pretty fancy!<span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">……a car which suits me perfectly for this new season i am entering
into: i have learnt that to be in absolute control of my life, living by laws
and not by grace does not bring freedom……in fact it leads to enslavement to
proving that i am worthy by what i do and not because of what, or rather who, i believe
in……..i have learnt that His Spirit is within me, automatically leading me, even when the world around me is encouraging me
to drive through life at top speed trying to get to a destination of
accomplishment i can rest in knowing that He is in control……….and now? now i feel like He is saying: you know I AM within
you, you know that you are in Me, all the power you need to live this life in
peace, joy and love is within you……..</span><b><i>we are one, in unity</i></b><span style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">: you are free to be
you, where you move I move, when I move you move……..in Him we live and move and
have our being………..i'm even learning that those hill starts when i have to use the hand break are not so bad after all-with Him in me i can overcome mountains and <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremyolivier-1/its-my-time" target="_blank">this is the time</a> for learning how!!!</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-51099020732657628672013-10-23T11:28:00.001-07:002013-10-23T11:28:36.794-07:00when you look into the mirror of liberty...............<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i was standing in my bathroom brushing my teeth............having just returned from an evening out with a few ladies from our fellowship, i was getting ready for bed..........there were words swirling around in my head, words which another woman had shared that night..........<br />
<br />
<i>"i've realised that it's ok to admit that i am crap........i can't do anything on my own, and that's ok!"</i><br />
<br />
i stared into the basin unable to raise my head to look into the mirror above........<br />
<br />
i.am.crap.<br />
<br />
but *i* wasn't ok with it...........in fact i was so far from being ok with it that i couldn't raise my eyes to look into the mirror at the tears running down my face, to see the reflection of the person who would be looking back at me..........i didn't want to see her face, didn't want to admit that i didn't like what i saw there, i didn't like the person she was.......<br />
<br />
and then there was a gentle whisper in my Spirit: look up, look into the Mirror, you may not love what you see, but I do..............<br />
<br />
it's been a few years since that night and i think i finally get it!<br />
<br />
when Jesus said He loved that person in the mirror, the one who felt she was messing up everything and totally unable to fix any of the mess i was creating, when He whispered that He loved me even if I didn't love myself, a door opened in my heart, a corner of the veil was lifted from my eyes and slowly <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/03/how-to-loose-weight-effortlessly.html" target="_blank">He started to show me just how much He loves me.</a>............<br />
<br />
you see when <b><i>i chose</i></b> <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/07/im-beginning-to-discover-who-i-am.html" target="_blank">to become a christian</a> i made it about a set of rules on how to behave..........and if i just got that right then i'd be a good mom, wife, person.........i had been trying so hard to fix myself from my past, to change how i behaved in the present that i had missed the point.........it was <b><i>never</i></b> about me choosing to follow Him, it had <b><i>always</i></b> been about <b style="font-style: italic;">Him choosing to love me first</b>........when He revealed <b><i>that truth</i></b> to me, that was when i finally became a believer........<br />
<b><i><br /></i></b>
when i believed <b><i>that truth</i></b>, then He was given access into my temple and His Spirit, which was within me, was awakened when He called out: take off the grave clothes, arise and come out of the tomb...........come live this Life with me............<br />
<br />
deep down inside what i was really struggling with was that i didn't really know who i was and what i was created for..........and i so desperately wanted to feel like i was good enough, like i was doing a good job, that i was accepted.......when He revealed that it was never because of my love for Him that i was accepted but it was always about His love for me that i am seen as perfected He whispered: if you want to know who you are, <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/07/im-beginning-to-discover-who-i-am.html" target="_blank">find out who I AM..........you are a perfect reflection of Me!</a><br />
<br />
and so i looked into the Mirror of liberty and what i am discovering daily is: He <b><i>really</i></b> did come to set me free..........He <b><i>really</i></b> did come so that i could experience eternal life and He <b><i>really</i></b> wants me to live life abundantly!!!!<br />
<br />
knowing that Jesus died for my sins is the tip of the ice-berg..........He didn't just come to die for me, He came to show me Life and what it means to live in a relationship with my Creator.........He came to share His life with me, to live in relationship with me daily...........He <b style="font-style: italic;">wants </b>to be with me! He <b><i>wants</i></b> me to experience the Life that He experiences............and He expects <b><i>nothing</i></b> in return.....<b><i>not.one.thing.</i></b><br />
<br />
my sins are not always the things i do, in fact most of the time sin is what i believe...........so when He said: find out who I AM, He began to reveal Himself to me more, He began to show me what He really has done for me..........and more and more my thoughts about Him began to be renewed.........He hadn't just come to die for me so that I could be forgiven for all that i had ever done wrong, He had come to set me free from how i believed i had to live..........which resulted in me making unwise choices...........choices which stole my joy, my peace, my love and which meant that i couldn't truly experience the life He had destined for me to live..........a life with Him in me experiencing His life lived through me:<b><i>unity</i></b>.......we are <b><i>one</i></b>, i live and move and have my being in Him and Him in me.........<br />
<br />
so this started a whole series of questions for me.........questions like this:if i am like You, because You died so that i could live the life that You live, then surely that means i should be experiencing all You experience? yes, My bride when we became one then you received all that I AM, now learn to walk with Me in you.........let me show you what My freedom really is...........it was never meant to be a burden to you, you were never meant to carry My load nor do My work for Me..........I came to serve You, receive what i have laid out for you.........come, sit down, rest, I have done <i style="font-weight: bold;">all </i>that needed to be done, My kingdom is established in you, let me show you how to live this life in Me...........ask and you will receive, just believe........you are seated at the right hand of the Father, like Me........you are a daughter in His kingdom, all that I have received you have too-this is your inheritance which has been given to you freely.........you don't need to prove you deserve it by sacrificing to Me, you have been completely forgiven.........you don't need to prove you earned it by doing for Me.........all that I want is to share my life with you........when I said it is finished it really was.......My kingdom does not need to be built by you, I have finished it all........come and enjoy it with Me.....<br />
<br />
<i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">James 1 vs 23-25 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of man he was. But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.</span></b></i><br />
<br />
i am learning that if i don't look into the face of Jesus when i am faced with the trials in this world, i can easily forget who the Father says i am.............. i may have heard the Word speaking of His love for me but if i let the thoughts in my mind drown out the truth that He says about me, i can easily forget who I am in Him...........when i look intently at the perfect law: all that i need to do is to believe in Jesus, then what i see in the mirror reflected back at me is the freedom to experience His life, fully blessed by the Father in all that i do...........<br />
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<br />
there are times when i feel that the Lord is teaching me something about Himself and i think: oh boy, if i told any one this they'd think i'm crazy..........but i'm definitely not the first to have these revelations : listen to <a href="http://www.dynamicministries.com/sunday-service-archive/message/my-faith-determines-my-reality-nico-uys.html" target="_blank">this sermon</a>........it will bless you.......and then maybe you'll agree i'm not the only crazy one ;-) </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-2472123763496338092013-09-08T10:57:00.001-07:002013-09-08T10:57:23.069-07:00replacing the old with the new.....<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i used to want to flee from the hard times in life.....try to run away from the challenges........avoid making life changing decisions.......long for the mountain tops when i was in a valley..........these were some of the habits that ruled me,<br />
<br />
it was easier to go through life not having to deal with pain, hurt or disappointment........so i did everything within my power to control what i could to avoid them........<br />
<br />
but the truth was:that controlling-thing i was doing, wasn't working out too well for me.......the more i tried to control my life, to protect myself and those around me, the harder it got to keep it together........instead of living in peace on earth........i was holding myself captive in my own little hell........<br />
<br />
eternal life for me is a given.........everybody can receive it, it's a free gift...........everybody will live forever.........in freedom or in chains, in the light or in the dark...........the thing is, at this present moment, my <b><i>physical</i></b> body is not living in eternity, it's living in the now......in the moment.......in this day that He has made......and to live in this day according to His will........i need to know His freedom............<br />
<br />
there was a time in my life when i thought that freedom meant the things i do would bring me freedom and not the things that i believed.......by His grace that did bring a certain kind of freedom.......but not the eternal kind........when i began to give up trying to control what i thought my life should/would look like He began to take me deeper to a place that will take the chains off, a place that helped me to see that it is not always the mountain top experiences that are life changing, but it is most often the valleys that i go through that will bring true Life to water the soil that had run dry within my soul to renew the Spirit within............<br />
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living in the Light brings Life.........living in the darkness keeps you captive to your old self, your old ways, your old habits........you can live in heaven here on earth.....or you can be held captive in hell....<br />
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i am still discovering freedom (i think it'll be a life long journey).......and i'm ok with that now-never used to be, wanted to know what the next step was, wanted to know how it was all going to look in the end, wanted the plan all carefully plotted out that i could follow..........<br />
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so how is He doing it? because, believe me it is nothing that i have done........all that i can do is believe and receive...........<br />
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like a Shepherd He has gently led me to places where i can eat, where i can receive what He has laid out for me to feast on..........i won't lie to you, it has not been easy <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/the-naked-truth.html" target="_blank">becoming naked</a>, <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/his-grace-covers-multitude-of-sins.html" target="_blank">realising that apart from Him i am nothing</a> but a clanging cymbal, <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/09/trust-in-lord-with-all-your-heart.html" target="_blank">giving up idols in my life</a>......<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/05/entering-into-new-season.html" target="_blank">facing the past</a>, learning <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/03/were-perfectly-forgiven.html" target="_blank">to forgive</a>.......allowing Him to do the work and not me...........<br />
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last year after He had shown me that it was time to share more, to not be afraid of becoming naked in front of others, He promised me that He would do the changing........He highlighted areas in my life that He wanted to renew and restore.....and i said great-let's do it!......and then i was invited to attend a seminar for a day-<a href="http://www.heartlifeindicator.com/" target="_blank">Heartlife: Insight for transformation</a>..........i had a choice: go and possibly become naked.........or avoid the whole experience entirely..........i wrestled with Him (as i sometimes do) saying: You said You'll do the renewing so why do i have to go to this seminar if You have promised that You will do what needs to be done?.......You said it, i believe it, so why must i go?...........because it's time to start being naked........<br />
we had to fill out forms and get three people to fill them out too.......you get the assessment back before the seminar and one thing was blatantly clear to me: to others i was someone completely different to whom i thought i was..........now this could be seen as no biggie, but to me it was another indicator that no one really knew me because i had always been too afraid to share my thoughts, opinions or feelings with those to whom i was closest to.......i knew that i had to go to the seminar as i felt that He was going to use it for good but my heart was feeling heavy.........i was afraid of being told that i wasn't capable of change.......<br />
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i recorded this experience in my journal, reading over it today i am amazed at what My Father was doing behind the scenes......<br />
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;"><b>journal entry: "Been listening to <a href="http://www.dynamicministries.com/" target="_blank">Bertie Britz</a> again-lots of meaty stuff-freedom from law and bitterness I need a deeper understanding of these things. I need to truly understand grace"</b></span></i><br />
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at the seminar we discussed how past experiences in our lives (both negative or positive) could set templates up for us which cause us to react to current situations with a habitual reaction.......for example: if you were never praised by a parent and you always received critical "encouragement" from them you would most likely become tense/fearful/weary in a situation of appraisal by an authority figure........<br />
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after discussing some of these habits and how they are played out in our lives we discussed how the negative templates would influence our relationship with the Lord........<br />
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<i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Genesis 3:8-13 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, Where are you? He said, I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself. And He said, Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat? And the man said, The woman whom You gave to be with me-she gave me from the tree, and I ate. And the Lord God said to the woman, What is this you have done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I ate.</span></b></i><br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">journal entry: "Separation-not believing what the Lord says about you."</span></i></b><br />
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then we were encouraged to spend time picturing where the Lord was in the room and what He was saying to us........<br />
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i saw Him kneeling in front of me.......holding out His heart towards me.........offering for me to take it and receive His heart, His Love, His ways.......to replace my ways and my habits.......<br />
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and after that i saw a picture of Ray and i on a beach, i was holding him........and then we walked together in unity down the beach........<br />
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during the seminar i had felt (most of the time) comfortable sharing my thoughts........until we were asked if we would like to participate in a play therapy session.........during this session we were told to use plastic dolls, furniture and other props to re-enact a stage in our daily life........my brain literally shut down......it felt like i didn't understand the question......like i didn't know what i had to do.......while everyone else set about the task at hand i panicked........i couldn't think of what scene i wanted to portray......i wanted to run away from the whole experience..........i wanted to avoid the feeling of pain that was welling up inside of me.............when i realised what the battle was about: nakedness in front of others-they would all see my scene, and if they're anything like me they're going to analyse what i put out in front of me-even if it was impossible to interpret........when i realised what i was afraid of i forced myself to see the picture that the Lord was revealing to me.....<br />
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it was the typical coming home scene (at the time) at the end of everyday in our home: i was standing behind our kitchen counter preparing supper, ray had just walked in the door.........and the kids were running down the passage into his arms to greet him.........my feeling at that time of day:i suck at what i'm doing and i was pretty peeved off at everyone and everything by the end of the day!<br />
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we were asked to answer some questions relating to the scene and as i answered each one to myself i realised that i saw myself as an unworthy, incapable mom and wife........it was easier for me to feel anger than acceptance and so i was afraid of rejection by my family and husband.......my past templates were dictating how i acted and setting a tone for rejection and fear in my home........<br />
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but then the Lord whispered this to me: I want to unite you.......don't be afraid........I don't see you the way that you see yourself.........I see you as a perfect mom and a perfect wife.......believe this!<br />
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i could have avoided that whole seminar........run away from the pain that i knew could be caused by it-facing who you believe you are can be painful, receiving who Jesus says you are brings freedom.......i am so thankful, that by God's grace, that i went along that day........He broke off more chains in one day than i could possibly have done in my own effort in the same time frame.........<br />
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so i've realised that sometimes facing the pain or going through it, is something you just have to do, but you'll never do it alone.......when God burns away the lies in your life and gives birth to new things it can feel painful.......there's a lie out there that says if you are a believer it's always going to be easy sailing when it gets stormy.......but what i've experienced is that sometimes you have to learn to walk with Him on the water of the storms trusting that He will make a way while He births something new in you.......something of Him......yes, it is tough to go through the valley's....and sometimes it can get pretty messy........it wouldn't be called taking battle ground if it wasn't messy.........but i promise you this: soaring above the mountain tops makes you forget all of the pain..............and doing it in His strength brings so much more freedom than doing it on your own.........<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Isaiah 40:31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. </span></i></b><br />
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i am so thankful that Jesus came to set the captives free.........if He had left me to figure it out all on my own i'd still be stuck in the miry clay.......but the truth is He came for that very purpose: setting us free from those things which prevent us from walking in the fullness of Him!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-53314724834553291892013-08-19T03:56:00.000-07:002013-08-20T00:16:41.310-07:00mondays aren't so blue anymore.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
the sun is beginning to rise earlier here in our corner of the world........the promise that winter is finally coming to an end.......i'm not a winter person-i'll take hot summer days over the cold winter nights anytime........but i can see why we have seasons.....there's a time for everything in our lives.........<br />
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i started running again around the beginning of the year, and i really enjoyed it, i even ran in a 5km fun run! but the winter rains have destroyed my running schedule-i am not that committed...yet!.......some mornings i get up and don my running gear, if i can't hear rain on the roof and the clouds look like they will not carry rain for the day.......... i've gotta have hope haven't i?!?..........but alas my takkies haven't hit the road much over the last three months!!!!<br />
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so when the urge for being outdoors hits, and i just can't take another day indoors i usually wrap up warmly and go for a walk on the beach.....there have been some gaps between the rainfalls ;-)<br />
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sometimes i find mondays i need that walk the most.........it's a culmination of a few things: a sunday indoors with the kids ;-) a monday that arrives and takes my precious family off to their places of being, a sunday of fellowship where you just wish the time spent together would never end because it's just so good to be in Love.........but mostly it's because i need time alone with my bestest of friends.........<br />
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so this morning when the sun rose earlier and there were no clouds in the sky i made a date with my old Friend, i dressed up warmly-there is still an icy wind-dropped the kiddies off at school, with love and kisses, and raced to the beach.............<br />
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it.was.beautiful.........why didn't i take the camera?!?!<br />
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as i walked along, basking in the Son, i breathed in the beauty that surrounded me.........sun bright in the sky, cool wind on my face, waves gently crashing on the sand, Light reflected on the sea..........<br />
although i love these times alone my heart was longing to have someone there to share with and talk to......my heart was singing and i wanted to share it....so i asked for someone to come along that i could chat to...........as i continued to walk along i watched the dogs walking on the beach and thought of a friend who recently left our shores to start a new exciting adventure........i just know her dogs would have loved that walk........but there is a time for everything in life........they lived and enjoyed Life here.......and they will enjoy Life in their new destination too!............other friends filled my thoughts too, they're also about to travel..........a time of fun lies ahead for them, a time of strengthening too.......i am so excited to see where the Lord leads them to.........<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">i reached the river near the end of the beach and couldn't go any further........it.was.so.wide...........no jumping over today!.........as the river entered the sea it divided........one part was wide and the other narrower...........the River is flowing wide and deep, it is time to jump in...........you can flow with it into the sea in the narrow stream or the wide.........it is your choice to make.........will you let the River lead you?</span><br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full.</span></i></b></div>
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">To the place the streams come from, there they return again.</span></i></b></div>
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i turned around and continued on my walk........Joy, oh sweet Joy, filled my soul and strengthened my Spirit.......i wanted to sing and shout and dance........but hey! i was on the beach!! so i resorted to singing in my head..........it was a song which my sweet jenny had listened to on sunday (on dad's hi-jacked phone this time! my kids have just discovered the technology we have and they are spending every possible minute on them-i can't hide the Truth from them), at bedtime jen had told me she just couldn't get the song out of her head.........like a rose, trampled on the ground, He took the fall and thought of me above all...........eventually i was singing it out loud while walking on the beach, well, loud enough for that old man to look at me as i walked past him...........crazy woman!!!<br />
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after spending some time on my own at the far end of the beach, sitting on the rocks-you don't feel like a crazy woman when you're sitting on a Rock...........it doesn't matter who is watching actually........i began the walk back to my car......and He whispered this to me: you are not naked anymore, you are crowned with My glory and you wear the robe of righteousness.....<br />
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seconds after having this revelation i bumped into an "old" friend with her husband and beautiful daughter...........i was so happy to see her......couldn't believe she was standing there right in front of me..........i'd seen on facebook that she was coming out to visit with her family and i had wondered if i would meet up with them.........actually, I had asked the Lord if He would make a way for me to see her.........there was something i wanted to tell her...........we walked and chatted and caught up on the goings on of our lives........and then we parted.........climbing into my car i realised that i hadn't said what i'd wanted to say to her..........so i got back out and told them what was on my heart: i am so stoked you guys got married......i remember the questions you had when you were dating.........their smiles were priceless!!!<br />
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when i got back into the car i remembered what i had asked the Lord for while i walked along the beach.......a friend to chat to............You are an awesome God..........You thought of me above all!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-58413949430033279492013-08-15T03:20:00.002-07:002013-08-17T08:56:13.925-07:00His grace covers a multitude of sins, yours.........and mine<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Proverbs16 vs 18 Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.</span></b></i></div>
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i woke up that saturday morning with a norah jones song in my head.......you humble me Lord, you humble me Lord, so please, please, please forgive me..........i knew i had done wrong and there was nothing i could do to take it back......it was done........<br />
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as i lay in bed my Daddy spoke gentle words to me..........He took me back to a grade one classroom, to a beautiful little heart i'd taught.......she believed in fairies........and i told her i didn't...... in front of a classroom of her friends........i saw her little face change from joy to disbelief........a relationship broken-from that moment on it felt like i could never reach that little girl's heart again........over the years i have thought of that precious little soul and wondered if she knows the Love of Jesus who accepts her no matter what she believes..........but My God, in His love and mercy, said to me that morning: she is in the palm of My hand, I will <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/draw-near-to-me-for-ill-draw-near-to-you.html" target="_blank"><b>draw her near to me</b> </a>in My time........you are forgiven........<br />
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then He took me to another time.......i was standing in the school passage with a teacher, she was trying to uncover the truth to an incident which had happened........i had been the one to "solve" the mystery by sharing what a friend had confessed to me in private.......she had done something and we would all be punished for it if the culprit wasn't found out.........i spoke the truth........but they wouldn't believe me because my friend had told them she was being wrongly accused.....they believed her and not me....i stood and listened as i was told that i was a liar and there was nothing that i could do to defend myself.........they would not believe me.......<br />
by God's grace ten years later we both sat in a music class (at college) together and for some bizarre reason the lecturer asked: have you ever done anything wrong to someone and you wished you could say sorry to them?.........my friend confessed to lying that day long ago, she apologised to me in front of a class full of our friends..........but to me it felt like she was the one who had been shown as the hero in the situation for confessing and putting things straight........me, i felt like the friend who couldn't be trusted........<br />
four years later i walked into the staff room of the school i was teaching at at the time to come face to face with the very teacher who had called me a liar........fear hit me in that moment:would she tell my fellow staff members of that long ago incident? did she still see me as a liar?..........she didn't know what my friend had confessed to........but instead, when asked what i had been like as a child at school, she answered in Love: she was the cutest little girl and all of the teachers fought over her to have her in their class................<br />
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the battle belongs to Me..........let Me fight the battle, you don't need to defend yourself.......the battle is already won...........<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Proverbs 16 vs 32 He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, he who rules his [own] spirit than he who takes a city.</span></i></b></div>
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i was supposed to go to the mall that saturday and i was doing everything to delay the inevitable........you see, i was afraid.......i didn't want to see anybody that i knew to be told that i had done damage......and so i did everything to avoid going.........eventually i told ray what i was struggling with.......i told him i'd been wrong to speak out, wrong to shame a fellow believer and i was afraid that i would have to face the consequences of my words........my husband is a wise counsellor-i didn't know how much until that morning-he encouraged me in Love........told me what he sees in me, and i felt strengthened to go and face the world........<br />
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walking to the car my little man came out begging me to buy him something at the shops.......i know his heart-he just loves gifts-his day is made when he receives something......anything.....but i was tired of hearing him beg.......so i sat down with him and told him: don't beg.........you're not a beggar.......who is the King of the world? he grinned and said:me.......who is the King of the world? God.......and you are His prince......you don't have to beg from Him, just ask.......He wants to give to you all that you ask for because you're His son.........mommy wants to give you all you ask for, somedays i can and i will.......but somedays you need to wait until i can........i went off to the shops, found what i was looking for and then felt i needed to buy what he had asked me for.........so i took one off the shelf (i thought jen and mike could share) and went to the till........use your loyalty points, He whispered......so i asked how many points i had.....enough to buy two! and cover some of the cost of what i'd gone to buy........as i was leaving (after seeing no-one i knew) i realised that even though i was believing that i had done wrong My Father was saying: even when you think you have done wrong i love you, i want to take care of you and i give you my love for free, in fact i gave you more than you even thought you should get....My Love is abundant.........i was so excited to get home and tell my boy what His Daddy had done for him: given him what he had asked for for free, i hadn't had to pay a cent for his gift!!!<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Proverbs 16 vs 33 The lot is cast into the lap, but the decision is wholly of the Lord [even the events that seem accidental are really ordered by Him].</span></i></b></div>
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there was more to be unveiled.......<br />
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i see-sawed that night between knowing that the Father was in control and thinking that it would just be better to hide.......forever ;-).........i realised that in all probability our friends at fellowship could have read <b><a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/08/youre-not-despicable-2-me.html" target="_blank">the blog post</a></b> too......what would they think?!?.........fellowship was the one place i felt safe and unconditionally loved.......would they still accept me even if i had done something despicable?........the Lord is pretty persistant though........once He has you on the palm of His hand He is never going to let you go........<b><a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/how-we-got-here.html" target="_blank">no matter how far away you think you can run</a></b>........i knew that i could go with Him beside me.......fellowship came.......and went........no mention of the blog post............<br />
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but the Father still has work to do in me (thankfully He promises to complete the good works He has begun)..........<br />
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mornings are tough when your flesh is being exposed to you.......and the world........it's often the time when i feel at my weakest..........dropping the kids at school meant i'd have to face more people who could possibly have read my blog..........guess that's what happens when you get <b><a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/the-naked-truth.html" target="_blank">naked</a></b> on facebook ;-)<br />
my precious kiddies accepted my lame excuse for not walking in with them........and i escaped back home to my castle.........i've learnt that it's best to run to the Lord when things are tough and not away from Him.........so i spent the day soaking in His word by listening to some of my favourite grace teachers..........i am always amazed at how the Lord feeds us.....everything i listened to that morning was encouragement to my soul........<br />
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later that day mike "accidentally" pushed the play button on my cell phone........the song that was playing: blessed be the name of the Lord, blessed be His holy name........He gives and takes away........He gives and takes away.........i get that you give Lord, but how can they sing so joyfully about You taking away?..........but somehow that song was balm to my soul.........<br />
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the following day i was faced with the truth of what i had done........of whom it had really effected.....and i wanted to hide (again)........but He encouraged me not to hide........i didn't have a car to fetch the kids, i needed a lift............a friend from fellowship was willing to help.........i sat in the car dreading that she would bring up the topic of my blog post..........instead He whispered to me: I give you the gifts that you need and take away the burdens that you don't need......I give and take away.......let Me fight the battle..........<br />
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it was a long week......by thursday i had come to terms with the fact that i had hurt others and that in all probability my children could be effected too.........loosing friends is not easy........but not my children too, Lord.........would you be happy if I was your only friend?.........yes, Jesus, You're the best friend i've ever had........i don't want to loose you too............then believe this: you don't have to fight My battles for Me...........I have already won.....no need to point out unbelief to others, you are not their judge...... just as i keep drawing you closer to Me I can draw all of mankind to Me..........just as I am unveiling the lies that you believe about yourself.........I can unveil their eyes too.......just rest in Me and enjoy the life I want to live through you.......that is all i want you to do.............I AM LOVE that is what I do...........<br />
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my God (and yours) is a God of Love.......sometimes you have to go through fire to burn away the chaff........most of the time i find that it is not what others do or say in the circumstances that i am facing that cause the most turmoil, but rather it is the lies that i believe about myself..........having these lies burnt away can be very painful to our flesh.........giving up what you believe about yourself and receiving what God says about you can be like the birthing process.......giving birth to new truth can be very messy.......realising you've believed a lie can hurt your pride........but holding that new life in your hands replaces all the pain with great joy..........His joy<br />
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know this: Love came to set you free..........where we may judge others as living, believing, doing wrong..........He does not judge this way........He is not sin conscious.....He is GRACE......He looks at you and judges you as LOVED........with no price to pay..........<br />
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i have been floored by this whole experience.........amazed at My Father's Grace through it all........the people whom i most feared loosing hadn't even read that post.........and i know now that even if they had they would still love me...........<br />
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so when all is said and done what have i learnt?.........i am a sinner who is as despicable as you.........i need to know Jesus and the Truth that sets you free from all lies...........just. like. you.........and the best part about it all? it's His work to set me free.......and that He has already completed!<br />
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so when He came to me again and whispered: you have judged others the way you think I have judged you.........now i want you to know that you are not judged as guilty, but as loved...........speak in Love.........I will show you how.......do you want me to teach you?.........yes, Lord, yes!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-57665004894241711372013-08-02T02:35:00.000-07:002013-08-02T09:13:00.935-07:00you're not Despicable 2 me.............. <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
my kids love to make minion jokes with their daddy...........the word bottom is followed by fits of giggles and many other related words and jokes-their dad has a great sense of humour-he gets them.......and i love that about him.........they all try desperately to make me succumb to their witty sense of humour and in moments of weakness i've been known to crack a smile...........or even reply with a shocker phrase which causes them to descend into the-place-no-mother-wants-their-family-to-go-to-at-supper-time........mayhem ;-)<br />
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ray and my kids love animation movies........in the school holidays he took them to see despicable me 2, i didn't go with them.......i needed time on my own and i knew that suggesting that they go see this particular movie together would be a great memory moment for all of them-they'd all loved the first one...........they came back with many tales to tell and reenacted their favourite moments for days on end.......ray became despicable dad with his two little minions playing their evil fart jokes on me for a while thereafter........<br />
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i haven't seen the movie myself yet so i can't comment on the story line.........i've seen the first one......<br />
i'm a sucker for happy endings...........i love it when the underdog overcomes......when the evil guy gets won over by good and he uses his strengths for restoration and not destruction........when the family that has lost all hope discovers that they have the strength to carry on........what can i say:i'm a chick who loves those kind of flicks...........<br />
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i used to worry about what my kids watched........would it influence their thoughts and actions....would they pick up bad habits from the characters in the movies..........that worrying doesn't happen as much as it used to.........they generally watch movies which are within the children's section of the dvd rental shops and we don't have dstv-not because we don't want it, it's just not in our price range at the moment.........so our limiting of what they watch is usually determined by availability, whether or not something which is portrayed realistically could become scary and real for mike (he's a warrior at heart-born to battle) or if the content could be too emotionally mature for jenna's perceptive, growing mind (our pure, joyful princess).......<br />
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last night i listened to an interesting conversation about movies........despicable me 2 had been the conversation focal point........i didn't contribute, just listened (what does one say when your children watched that very movie that afternoon when you used it as a babysitting aid while you tried to catch a nap)........i know that in all probability i could offend someone with what i want to share next........but i'm going to say it anyway.......<br />
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my heart has been heavy today.......i'm sad.........sometimes i wish that when i'm in a situation that the Word that is within would come out.........one day.........<br />
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my friend and her family are celebrating their dad's birthday today, part of the plan was to see Despicable Me 2.........to share a family moment making a memory together...........i'm wondering if that part of the plan got trashed last night...........i hope that it didn't........because Love is more powerful to overcome any "bad habit" that her children may have been exposed to in that movie...........<br />
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yes, the main character may have made some bad choices in his life, the children of today may be portrayed as defiant and disrespectful towards adults in the movies made today..........it is a sign of the times-a sign of how much we misunderstand what Jesus really did for us.........instead of encouraging your child not to play with someone who acts like that, instead of teaching them that if that man stood before Jesus He would not like his behaviour.............teach them about how Jesus sees that man..........loved, forgiven........perfect in his sight.....teach them about why that man made the choices he did...........what he believed about himself wasn't true:i am unlovable, i am what i do, therefore i am despicable............<br />
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don't be afraid to watch that movie or read a book because it doesn't teach good values........Jesus is reflected in everything (yes, even before He came to earth God was already reflecting Him in the ancient Japanese{?} writing you were teaching your precious children about-He's awesome isn't He?).......trust that they may see Jesus' restoring power in the despicable man who learnt that he was worthy of love.......trust that they may be grace conscious and not sin conscious....trust that He will lead them to green pastures and not into evil.......trust that they may know that they are truly forgiven and that they will see that we all-yes even that person who doesn't confess to believe in God-we all reflect Him to the world.......God does not look at what you do to say you are loved and behaving acceptably........you were loved before you were in your mother's womb........instead He looks at Jesus-the only Word that you need to spend time soaking in, surrounding yourself with............seek Him and all those good things you want your children to walk in will be added unto them, effortlessly..........a free gift from the God who looks at Jesus, sees you and says: you. are. not. Despicable. 2. me.......<br />
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p.s. i love you, my friend, and i hope that you will know that you are living a radical life with Jesus right where you are.........<br />
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the joyful laughter of my little minion princess........priceless</div>
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silly monkey minion</div>
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i love you mommy..........His Love is reflected everywhere.........open our eyes Lord, we want to see Jesus</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-68823069642443990122013-07-31T05:42:00.001-07:002013-08-02T09:13:53.658-07:00He keeps His promises.........<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Hey kid, did you think this was the easy life?</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Hey kid, you gotta stand up and deliver</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Always getting what you want </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">You're gonna have to push aside,</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">They've got you all encircled and there's nowhere you can hide,</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Hey kid, did you think this was the easy life?</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Thinking about our early childhood years,</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Makes me wonder where it went wrong,</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Didn't the things we went through make you strong?</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">No, that ain't the answer this was meant to be…..</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Hey kid did you think this was the easy life? </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">i penned those words when i was about fifteen, it was a song, so there's more to it but i can't remember it now.......and that book i threw away long ago-throwing away the past........it was a reaction to the reality that was my life at the time.......my brother had gone off to the navy, leaving home for the first time........mom and i were left alone with my dad.......my brother had a break down while in training, he was put in the psych ward at 2 mil hospital under observation.......i remember the helpless feeling i had when i was told that he had been placed in that ward..........not my brother-the one who was always strong and determined to succeed.........my silent, strong fighter was loosing a battle ..........was history repeating itself?.......it's all a blurry memory now so i don't remember all the facts, i think my mom asked for the doctors to do tests to confirm that my brother wasn't bi-polar like my dad, thankfully he wasn't.........i have a faint memory of a letter or conversation with my brother-he was concerned about mom and i being alone with dad.......he wanted to take care of us.......</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">reality was: he couldn't.........</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">i had a similar experience happen to me when i finally plucked up the courage to leave home.......being the last to leave i felt like i was abandoning my mom (my parents were separated by this time).......but i knew that if i stayed i would never pluck up the courage to leave, so when a friend asked me to come and live with her i took that first step towards reality.......</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">when you're in a <a href="http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/go/codependency" target="_blank">co-dependent relationship</a> you don't realise it-unless it is pointed out to you......... so when i left home i didn't realise that i was struggling with adapting to the reality that our family life had been anything but normal............and so i crashed.........the scary thing was i felt like i had no-one to talk to.........co-dependents don't talk about their trials, they just try to get on with life denying what they are really feeling.......</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">it was around about this time when i ended that <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/draw-near-to-me-for-ill-draw-near-to-you.html" target="_blank">long term relationship</a>........the only way i felt that i could start life again was to have a new beginning..........i'm so thankful that it wasn't up to me to rebuild my life........Jesus had already begun His work in me, He had been <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/draw-near-to-me-for-ill-draw-near-to-you.html" target="_blank">drawing me to Him </a>before I moved out of home...........i know now that it is only because of His love that I am living a normal family life now........</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">one or two years after leaving home (it's also a little blurry for me), i met my husband to be.......when he asked me to marry him i was petrified-so much so that i returned the ring he had given to me..........but he never walked away...........</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">i went for counseling over the next few months, our pastor and his wife took me in for the school holidays (such love!)...........the Lord used a few sessions with a psychiatrist to unlock the past for me: I was afraid to commit, afraid to make a decision that I believed would cause me to destroy another person's life..........but God in His Love gave me the courage to realise that it was a decision I had to make for myself, no one else could tell me who to marry, no one else could say i wasn't marriage material (we had done a personality assessment, at a marriage course, after which we were advised that i shouldn't get married-not to Ray-but in general)..........</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">sometime in the midst of all this i attended a series of talks about restoring the ancient paths........i don't remember much about the talks but someone prayed for me one night, after they had prayed they said they felt that the Lord was saying that the years that the locusts had destroyed would be redeemed to me............</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">we attended a friend's fortieth this past week-end.........it was a lovely celebration of his life.......two of his friends gave a speech in which they spoke highly of him, commending him for having integrity, loyalty, wisdom and for achieving great things in his life (he is a principal of a school), his wife had sung a humorous song to him about their life together.........during the evening i looked over at my precious husband......he was wearing a sweatshirt which he owned before we got married, shoes which needed fixing and his shaggy, overgrown beard-he had grown out of protest-needed a trim ( i really don't like cutting his hair-so he jokingly told me he wouldn't trim his beard until i cut his hair)...........i wondered if his friends had noticed..........but, for the first time ever, I realised that i didn't really care if they had.......i had been myself at that party, I wasn't ashamed to be myself-to joke about his hairy unkempt beard, or admit that i was a housewife when asked what I was doing, we couldn't chat about the latest additions to our home or share about the exciting new work experiences we were having, but it was great to hear what other's were doing........i was happy for them........it was a good evening......<br /><br />when we left the party i had been processing what i had experienced.........i couldn't quite put into words what i felt, but i think i said something to ray like: for the first time i wasn't really bothered about what others were sharing about their lives, i don't feel like i'm doing much compared to them, but it's ok........he replied: that's because you're at rest........you don't need to be doing anything now.....<br />we got to bed late that night, i knew we could sleep in late the next morning as the kids were sleeping over at friends..........but i was woken around six o'clock by a gentle whisper...........i realised what else i had been processing that night: ray will turn 40 soon, he's been trying to decide what to do to celebrate........we don't have a huge group of friends (and that's ok ;-) and at this present moment we don't have money to host a big party..........but if i could stand in front of a crowd of people to celebrate my husband i wouldn't want to speak of the wonderful places we have travelled to or the career which he has persued, asking his friend's to come up with a list of characteristics which they think define him wouldn't tell people about the man that i know.........the man who told me that he would wait for me to love him when i told him that i didn't think i could ever love him the way he needed to be loved..........the man who told me that he saw potential in me to love and that even if he had to wait till we were old for me to love him.......he would wait.........how do you tell a crowd of people that you are proud to be someone's wife because: while the Lord restored, renewed and rebuilt your life, he waited patiently.............how do you tell a crowd of people that for all of the riches in the world, all of the places to journey to, i would rather have a happy family........i would rather be with a man who allowed me to persue the true Lover of my soul so that i could love him the way that Christ has loved me, unconditionally.....what i have found in Christ is priceless and i am so thankful to My Kinsman Redeemer for giving me the blessing of a good man.........</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">my love, you mean the world to me..........p.s i think i'm ready to cut your hair now</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">note: when i read the link to co-dependency it brought me to tears.........so thankful to the Father for His ability to restore.........i can take no credit for my change of heart.... all glory and honour to Him!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #4c1130; font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"><i>Ephesians 2 vs 6-10 And He raised us up together with Him and made us sit down together in the heavenly sphere in Christ Jesus. He did this that He might clearly demonstrate through the ages to come the immeasurable riches of His free grace in kindness and goodness of heart toward us in Christ Jesus. For it is by free grace that you are saved through your faith. And this is not of yourselves, but it is the gift of God; Not because of works, lest any man should boast. [It is not the result of what anyone can possibly do, so no one can pride himself in it or take glory to himself.] For we are God's handiwork, recreated in Christ Jesus, that we may do the good works which God predestined for us, that we should walk in them. [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us to live.]</i></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">p.s sorry i'm having font problems.......hope it didn't come out too big/small ;-)</span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-16650225381680879332013-03-14T04:50:00.001-07:002013-03-17T12:46:33.736-07:00the man i married.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
on sunday ray rode in the argus cycle tour for about the sixth time since we have been married........he used to ride quite a bit before we met.....think he had about ten under his belt by that time........there was one year we decided to do it together........<br />
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it was just before we got married, i was still living in a block of flats at the bottom of ou kaapse weg, in fish hoek valley, still teaching......we started training a little bit in the holidays but as term time set in the practices became less and less.......ray, having ridden the route before, knew it would be a good thing for me to experience a mountain pass before the day........so my mind would be prepared.......but i didn't want to do ou kaapse weg.........and i kept putting it off.......until all practicing came to a complete halt.......<br />
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on the morning of the ride i was pretty excited to be doing the ride with him......something different......something for us to do together.......<br />
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but i was intent on not pushing myself too hard.......it is a long ride after all! i had decided that i would take on the attitude of "it's a fun ride-let's enjoy the scenery"........rather frustrating for someone who was used to riding at a pace and completing the tour in under five hours.......<br />
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we were doing fine until we reached the bottom of ou kaapse weg.........i could see home......and i could see the mountain up ahead.......my mind wasn't in it......i convinced him that i couldn't go on...... i chose home........he said he wanted to finish the ride......we were part of the stragglers by that time and although my legs (and mind) had given up ray's hadn't.........<br />
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when he got back to me after the race he told me that he had just missed the cut off time, seven hours in the saddle......but he had finished.......he told me how he had felt to fly past some of those stragglers, with legs that weren't tired......we giggled at how strange it must have been for them to see this guy come blazing past them still riding strong when it was late in the day and by this time no-one else should have been looking like they were riding with ease.........and even though i hadn't finished the race he didn't hold it against me.....<br />
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a few years later we were married and had kids.....our marriage was struggling........the Lord was restoring the past and i was still learning to let Him be my restorer.......i still wanted to do things my way.....wanted to fix the problems as quickly as they arose.........while he wanted to cross the bridges when we came to them.........(oh, how that phrase irritated me in those days)........I believed that what i wanted was right, what i expected ray to be was who he was meant to be.....<br />
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one day, after spending the morning in our room, avoiding all conversation and contact with my husband.......pleading with the Lord to help me to love him like He loves him......i knew i wasn't, but i still believed that i was right and he wasn't being the husband and father he was made to be.......<br />
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i climbed into the shower, knowing i had to be a part of our family, had to show my face to the kids...........being naked in front of the Lord tends to open my eyes.......He showed me how, as a little girl, i had desperately wanted to feel my father's presence, wanted him to be a part of our lives........but he wasn't, his mental illness had built walls between us....... his past had built walls between us........and although i knew he desperately wanted to be loved, it was all too often stolen from him.......our father-daughter relationship was not built on time or sharing experiences together.......and so i had expected ray to be the dad i had never had: the dad who was physically and mentally present one hundred percent of the time......in fact i wanted him to be more than the dad my dad was.......i wanted him to be perfect.......<br />
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i climbed out of the shower knowing that i had to say sorry........struggling with that too.......but eventually i did.....i found him outside hanging up the washing........being the dad he was made to be.....<br />
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we've been together almost twelve years now.......i believe that day was the turning point for us......the Lord has had to do a lot of restoring for me, but that's His business anyway so i'm thankful that i can hand over my struggles to Him.....it's too hard trying to do it on my own.........<br />
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when my eyes were finally opened, when i could finally let ray be the dad and husband he has been created to be, this is what the Lord showed me:<br />
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the man i married is my mr steady.......he'll keep on riding this race of life with me to the end......even go over mountains for me when i think i can't.......and if i let him lead i'll soon see that it is way better to be on top of the mountains with him than to stay in the valleys of doubt without him.......<br />
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lately i've been asking the Lord to show me how to Love everyone like He does.......open your eyes to see how everyone reflects my Love.......each one of us reflects the Father's love.......believer or not.......He created all......and so all reflect His glory.........<br />
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when i look back on this experience in my life i can see how the Father used the man i married to reflect His Love for me.........even before we were married.......He has steadily stuck by me helping me to overcome mountains which i thought would never move.......<br />
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"To my Love, I am so thankful to the Father for blessing me with you........long ago you thought you could never fill the shoes.........you've done more than that already and we've only just begun......i look forward to riding with you till the end, i just know we're going to enjoy the ride. Loveyoulotslikejellytots!"</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">last year's argus</td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-75294882672266035272013-03-07T06:26:00.000-08:002013-03-17T12:54:41.982-07:00learning to love like You......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i dropped my little girl at school today with a cooler box filled with fluffy toys and a fishing net........she is taking part in the second round of the speaker reader competition at school.......<br />
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after that i drove to the beach to meet a friend for our morning walk and watched the sea.....it was so peaceful, no wind, no white choppy horses......still.......be still and know that I am God.........<br />
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but my heart was not still......i was thinking of what she had said in the car: i really want to get through to the finals mommy......i had reminded her to enjoy herself and to remember to speak loudly....it was the only encouragement i felt i should give but in my mind i was desperately wanting her to win, wanting her to succeed, wanting her to know what it is like to be a winner........<br />
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as i sat and looked at the sea His whisper led me down memory lane........to a girl who deeply believed that she could be a leader, knew that she could stand up in front of a crowd and encourage them to follow her lead......she knew it, but she didn't believe it........no-one had seen what lay deep within her, no-one knew her real desires, no-one had encouraged her to be what lay deep within.......<br />
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and then He whispered some more........this is what I believe about you: you can be who you want to be........just be still and know that I am in control........<br />
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and so He showed me that it's ok to want the very best for my child-He wants the very best for me........<br />
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but what if she doesn't achieve this desire Lord? in My time it will happen.......this is a process, let me show you what is happening:<br />
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last year jenna came home and told you about the speaker reader competition, she chose her poem-even though you thought it probably wasn't the most dramatic, wouldn't appeal to the listener's, you knew she had to do what she chose......it fact she was pretty adamant it wasn't going to be any other way ;-) .......so you helped her to practice the best you could (even though she didn't always listen to your advice).......and she got through to the second round.......she knew her words but she spoke too softly.......a boy with a long joke, which made the audience laugh, won......<br />
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so this year when she came home and said i want to write a story about a penguin that will make the boys laugh, you knew she had learnt from her past experiences.......so while she dictated her story to you, you gently guided and discussed and encouraged her ideas while you typed......amazed at your little girl's creativity......<br />
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do you remember when she gave up gymnastics-even though she was so good at it- and I told you that the world looks at our talents as something we do and not as THE gift that i have placed deep within you poured out to them through the works I have prepared in advance for you to do?...... I told you that you need to encourage her to believe in (and receive) what I have given her............love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control...... that these are the real gifts which we shouldn't hide under the jar, the talents we shouldn't bury in the ground.......these are the gifts i have created you to share, to bless the world with........this is Me being in control, this is Me training her in the gifts i have placed deep within her........this is Me being her teacher, giving her my knowledge.......<br />
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when you were a child there was no-one who consistently encouraged you to be who you are......this is the passing on of what I have blessed you with.......your legacy........<br />
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remember when she took part in the school play last year as fairy-sa-jolly-good-fellow?.......she really wanted to be in that play, you knew she could do it, believed she had the ability to remember the words......and then on the night she stood on the stage all beautiful and innocent......... and she forgot what she had to say.......it was tough for you to watch, especially when you took her little friends with the next night and you really wanted her to do well.........listening to the lady in front of you say: this little girl never remembers her words, broke your heart........you really wanted her to prove her wrong......but she didn't, she forgot again.........why? you asked.......because she doesn't believe in herself, she's just like you used to be.........you need to encourage her more........you went home and shared it with ray and you said you didn't know how to do that...........well, this is Me training you.....you know what lies deep within you now........speak it over her, bless her with your words, tell her who she is because of who I AM.........<br />
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<a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/06/thoughts-that-run-around-in-my-head.html">don't teach her what the world teaches</a>:it is what we do in life that is our purpose........her purpose is to know Me, to be in relationship with me, and when she knows this she will know the freedom that she was created for........to be exactly who she desires to be........for I placed those desires deep within her before she was even created in your womb........<br />
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this learning-to-love-like-you Lord, it ain't easy when i do it my way, i'm learning more and more everyday that it is only when i don't know how, when i say: i am weak, show me your ways, it is only then that You can burn away the <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2013/03/how-to-loose-weight-effortlessly.html">fat of unbelief.</a>.........thank You Father for leading me on your paths and showing me Your ways........thank You that because of You i will wait patiently while You teach my precious jolly-good-fellow to spread the joy and love you have placed deep within her.......thank you for loving us just the way we are<br />
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if you have the time.......listen <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQRClW6_CTg">here to this song</a>......hope it blesses you<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-66125975406423645052013-03-02T11:59:00.000-08:002013-03-17T12:46:59.308-07:00how to loose weight effortlessly.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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i always used to wonder why when the people made sacrifices to the Lord in the old testament it was usually followed by words like this:<br />
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Exodus 29vs 25 and burn them on the altar for a sweet and satisfying fragrance before the Lord; it is an offering made by fire to the Lord.</span></i><br />
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especially when it came to fat.......fat? why would the smell of fat please the Lord? isn't that the stuff we are not supposed to eat? wouldn't He just want the best meat from us? surely He doesn't want the fat too? that's the unhealthy stuff.......the stuff we really don't need.......<br />
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over the last few years i believe that He has slowly shown me why the smell of fat burning is pleasing to Him......<br />
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fat IS the stuff we really don't need, it's the beliefs about ourselves (and Him) that we have that hold us back from walking in Spirit and Truth........the things we think we need to do to be righteous.......and sometimes they are beliefs we don't even know are there until He gently shows us.........<br />
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when the Father first started pulling at my heartstrings, gently trying to help me to let go, i thought that He was asking me to sacrifice what I treasured most in the world.......instead He was really asking me to receive......<br />
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you see what i believed was that He was a God who asked you to give up things that are precious to you......because if i wasn't sacrificing something then i wasn't being a good person, wife, mother.....<br />
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and so in His gentle way He started showing me that He is a Father who wants us to receive His life.......not make sacrifices.......just believe and receive.......because what He is i am...... because of what Jesus sacrificed for me........no more sacrificing needed from me, it is finished........<br />
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He first whispered about renewing my mind.......changing what i believed in, to become someone i believe in........because when i find myself in Him: all His promises are yes! and amen (so be it!)....<br />
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i believed that i had chosen Him.......instead He had chosen me.......He had persued me......and when He renewed that belief i finally could begin to accept His gifts which He so willingly wanted me to receive.......<br />
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burning away the fat IS pleasing to our Lord.......and effortless when we receive what He freely gives.....His life in us, completing the good works He has begun.......<br />
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so around the end of 2011 when i was trying to come to terms with the fact that the life i was living was about to change i felt that i should join the gym.......honestly, i wasn't a gym person at the time, i'd tried that all before and it didn't really work......but i felt it was something that the Lord was saying i should do so i joined.......when the Lord says do, i often ask why? and because He's patient with me sometimes i think He gives me a glimpse of the why ;-) .......but there's always so much more to Him........He was busy restoring........one of the things i had beaten myself up about when it came to home schooling was that i couldn't possibly have been a good home schooler because i just didn't have the self-discipline......instead He showed me that i do, when i believe what He says about me.......i have his mind......i have His self-control......and when i'm walking where He leads what was once a burden becomes very light to carry........so instead of finding gym to be a labour as it had been before, it became a blessing to me......in fact going to gym has become a place where He whispers His love to me often.......<br />
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one day last year, while in the pool doing aqua, i felt Him saying to me: like you are fully immersed in the water now, THIS is what I am going to do for you.......immerse you fully into Me.......<br />
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and so for a year i went to gym........and didn't loose one ounce of fat!<br />
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at the beginning of this year i was reconsidering gym......do i do this still......it wasn't working, i hadn't lost any weight....and then He reminded me about an eating plan i had followed when trying to conceive (which i still believe was one of the reasons why i eventually did conceive).......a balanced way of eating......and so i joined up again.....and in one month i lost three kilograms........why Lord?<br />
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by going to gym and doing the exercises, i showed you that i am within you and that because i am within you you DO have self-discipline.......you didn't need to run to anyone/anything else to find your way, what i have placed within you is good enough to do all things i will lead you to do.........and life is not about doing the right exercises to loose the fat.......the extra weight you carry.......feed on me, eat from my life and i will take away the fat (beliefs) that weigh you down.......be careful what/whom you feed off of-where/whom you get your life from.......you don't have to do the work i haven't created you for......this tires you out and becomes a burden to you.....just let me lead you and when you follow I will renew your mind to be like mine..........all I have is within you.......freely receive,<br />
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the past two months have been so interesting........i realise that i am at the beginning of a very exciting new step on this journey with Christ......His Love being poured out into me........and whereas before i believed that i was unworthy of receiving His Love, He is burning away the fat and i am longing to freely receive His Love........and so by His grace i live in hope that the weight of unbelief will continue to fall off effortlessly.......both in mind and body ;-)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A rare occurrence......me caught on camera! Dec 2011</td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-92167474621680233962013-02-09T08:28:00.001-08:002013-03-17T12:54:41.990-07:00how we got here (part two)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i thought i'd continue with our <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/how-we-got-here.html">change from homeschooling to schooling story....</a><br />
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<i>journal entry</i>: scared to go to s.v.p.s. and ask for fees and application forms-rejection? i told you so?? not hearing and then i have egg on my face?? help Lord, I need your guidance-clearly<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Mark 4: the storm-<b>have faith in Jesus</b></span><br />
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i stood in the foyer of the school during mike's gymnastics lesson......trying to pluck up the courage to ask for forms.....i was hiding......i had just seen the principal walking towards me outside and i had literally run so that he wouldn't have a chance to stop and say hello, to chat, to ask questions.......so now i hid in the corner of the foyer.......wrestling with my thoughts again,<br />
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i have to ask for them i thought, i had told ray I would, can't go back on my word......have to do what i said...<br />
so i eventually submitted to honoring my husband-knowing that he would expect me to do as we had discussed......<br />
the woman at reception knew we were home schoolers....so when i approached and stammered: i need to ask for application forms.....she smiled cheerily and said oh i thought you were home schooling....um, yes, we are, but i have to do this....oh ok, you know you could ask at the rock academy too, they have smaller classes......i know, but, um, that's not what we want.....well we feel that this is where we are supposed to apply, we think it is what the Lord wants........are they still having interviews? i think the last one is next week......<br />
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<i>journal entry:</i> Numbers 22 Balaam and his donkey-didn't do what God had told him. The angel stopped his donkey until God made the donkey speak. Then Balaam saw the angel and he realised he was wrong. So he says:<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">vs 11 The word that God puts in my mouth, that shall I speak." </span><br />
That is how I want to live Lord. Doing what You say when You say it!<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Numbers 23 vs 12... Must I not be obedient and speak what the Lord has put in my mouth?</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">vs 26 "Did I not say to you, All the Lord speaks, that I must do?"</span><br />
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<i>journal entry:</i> Put application forms in yesterday. Have to wait to be invited. No pre-school report-very little points-and who knows if the person who processes the papers will even know that I taught there. So it's in God's hands now. Told Jen yesterday-at first she was tearful-and by the end of the day she was excited. Prayed with Ray again. He read <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/how-we-got-here.html">Proverbs 16-the verses</a> which have been rolling around in my head for a while.........wait, rest, trust......accept whatever happens.<br />
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the date for the last interview came.......and went......we didn't receive an invitation to attend and i thought: ok, so i heard wrong.......well, that's ok we'll just carry on as before.......but deep within i knew this wasn't over......<br />
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almost a week later i sat at the breakfast table in the morning when jen arrived for breakfast......<br />
<i>journal entry:</i> Jenna had a dream about school. She says the Lord spoke to her and told her she would be going to school. <br />
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wow, You really want this to happen........<br />
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i won't lie to you, although i felt certain that the Lord was guiding us down a new path, i struggled to let go.......holding on to a way of life was easier,<br />
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the phone rang later that week: hello? hi, it's allison from s.v.p.s we are having the last interview for a few stragglers who applied late, are you still interested in your child attending? my first thought was: i could say no and this would be the end of it all.....Ray would never know that they phoned........who am i kidding? i can't lie to him.........uh, ok, i said, we will attend.....<br />
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i was sick that day, didn't feel much like talking, so we sat with the other parents listening <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;">while our precious little girl sat with the children drawing pictures.......we did the tour, walked through the passages........are we seriously doing this? am i really coming back here? walking up the stairs to leave she reached for my hand and said: i like it here mom, i want to come, it's going to be ok, i know i will make friends.......my heart was in turmoil, but i had to smile at this brave little girl, had to be strong, had to say: yes, i know you will........</span><br />
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after that time we started to slowly let people know what we were going to do.......a few whom i thought would support us, would understand we were following the Lord's guidance.......ray's folks found out quite by accident, jen let it slip, their reaction made me angry........why couldn't they have been that supportive of homeschooling?</div>
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i struggled with depression for a while.......was i not good enough to homeschool Lord? did you think i couldn't do it?</div>
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<i>journal entry</i>: Ray searched the word on Saturday night about being depressed.......when you have a major spiritual breakthrough you can often enter into depression after being on the high of 'being' with God-He read about Elijah and the prophets of Baal. I felt an immediate lift and relief.......at fellowship we shared with <i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">friends</span></i> and they said he'd been going through the same thing!!! <i>(over something the Lord had been leading him to do)</i></div>
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Deut 31 vs 8 It is the Lord who goes before you; He will [march] with you; He will not fail you or let you go or forsake you; [let there be no cowardice or flinching, but] fear not, neither become broken [in spirit] ( depressed, dismayed and unnerved with alarm)</div>
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slowly my Father ministered to me........showing me where my heart had been.......and where He was leading me to....</div>
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Deut 7 vs 6 For you are a holy and set apart people to the Lord your God; the Lord your God has chosen you to be a special people to Himself out of all the people on the face of this earth.</div>
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<i>journal entry:</i> what has God called you to do to set you apart? Being set apart doesn't mean you take on a "doctrine" of a certain group, rather it means you follow God's voice for setting you apart-His exact instructions to you which will bring glory to God because of how your life reflects His way.</div>
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but it takes time to renew your mind (i still battle at times we i'm comparing, thankfully it's getting less)……it has taken time for Him to renew, to show me what i had put my faith in........and not whom i had put my faith in.......i had a dream in which the Lord revealed to me how I had placed my faith in home schooling to create the perfect environment for my children to grow up in.......they were perfect on the outside...but not within, where it really counts.......</div>
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during the next four months He gently whispered to me…….showing me how much He loved me, wanted to bless me……..wanted to renew my mind…..in our home i saw more freedom growing in our lives……..i could see how my husband was more relaxed………but that didn't stop me from feeling angry on the days i felt weak, feeling like i was the one having to give up, the one who had to change……and still He continued to whisper His love…….</div>
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i had days, no, weeks when i grappled with the decision again…….even sat and chose a curriculum, planned a school room……..told my little girl her mommy was feeling like it would be best to home school but i was still deciding……..it's ok mom, whatever you want to do i am fine with that…….</div>
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we spent the day with family after the new year and an aunt asked jen if she was excited to be going to school…….innocently she looked over at me and said: am i home schooling mommy?….. granny was not happy to hear that and while i was inside she interrogated my poor husband, who dutifully defended my latest decision………i was angry again: why can't they just believe in me?……..and He unlocked another key, pride………i'm just going to do it and prove them all wrong!</div>
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and so i tried to convince Ray again.......comparing........with my wisdom and not the Lord's ........ causing him to toss on the waves of doubt.......the tossing to and fro was making my little girl anxious, her boldness was slowly dying.........</div>
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we went away on our family camping trip knowing a decision needed to be made, when we returned school would start in two days..........</div>
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we tried to relax, enjoy time together as a family away from home....... away from reality.......i kept on asking ray how he felt, wanting him to make the decision...... not wanting to be the one who had to submit.......</div>
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ray had a beautiful dream while we were away.......a promise of a beautiful year ahead.......falling in love with His Saviour, our Provider........and i knew then that it would be ok, that He would provide all the strength i needed to walk this new path........i was at peace again,</div>
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we returned home to buy jen her school uniform........and to start our <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2012/11/its-been-year.html">roller coaster</a> first year at school......trusting that the only Rock we should build our home on is Jesus........the only path we should follow is His....not putting our faith in a way of life but rather in the way to life.......</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-83412441731490510462012-11-24T04:13:00.000-08:002013-03-17T12:47:09.696-07:00draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i>do me a favour, click on the video and let it play softly as you read this post</i></div>
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i grew up with a catholic mother who, in our early years, dutifully dragged us to church every sunday, to sit, stand, repeat the words, listen to the Word, kneel, pray, sit, stand.......until it became routine,<br />
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when i was old enough to receive first holy communion and after completing the sunday school lessons preparing me for this occasion, it was time to enter the confession booth for the first time......i sat and waited for my turn and watched as a boy was dragged kicking and screaming to the booth, it was whispered that he didn't like to enter closed places......neither did i.......and fear climbed up within......i didn't want to enter that place and tell a strange man all the things i had ever done wrong, i didn't know him......i remember thinking:why couldn't i just speak to Jesus?<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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our family entered into a storm after this time, which would seem to last a lifetime........we left our home and friends behind to make a new beginning...........only to return with too much shame to share.... slowly we retreated, the routine of church lost.........i found a family in which i could take refuge somedays, their home offered stability, unity and acceptance......they spoke of Jesus and took me to a church totally different to the routine that i had been used to.....<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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eventually the routine of church crept back into or life, mom taking us back to the faith in which she had grown up .....time came for confirmation classes and i questioned why? why must i pledge a faithfulness to a church, to a faith i did not understand? attend the classes, you will find your answers there.....i didn't, but i stayed to complete the lessons and attend a retreat in a little church on a hill, not far from where i now live, i was asked to read the Word for the day........i wish that i could remember what i read that day, but i can't......all that i can remember was feeling: this is what i am meant to do......read the Word.......<br />
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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when i entered college a few years later i was surrounded by believers of different denominations, i still thought of myself as a catholic, although i wasn't attending church regularly with my mom anymore......our family had separated and she was allowing me the freedom to live my life......</div>
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and then one day someone challenged my thoughts: you can't be a christian if you're a catholic..... i began to question more......basically she believed that i prayed to mary and that i shouldn't, that i should only pray to Jesus......i, personally didn't pray to mary, i didn't pray to anyone really.......but what she had said stirred something deep within: why couldn't i just speak to Jesus?</div>
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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at an s.u. children's camp a year or so later i chose to believe.......my life would never be the same again...</div>
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i started searching for a home in which to worship the Lord and found myself at a methodist church where i became part of the worship team......singing the Word, after a year or so the young minister left to lead another church and a few months later the youth started leaving too......members of our band were starting to attend a nearby baptist church, they said it was filled with youth and awesome worship, everyone was going there.......my friend invited me to go with her.........eventually i ventured to join the tide.......my friend and i joined a cell group and later when we moved in together we hosted the cell group..........it was during this time that i was wrestling with another big decision in my life........to walk away from a long term relationship........</div>
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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this was a stormy time of my life, i had left home, left a long-term relationship, was just beginning my teaching career and now i felt like i was on my own......shy, self-concious i struggled to fit in at the church......</div>
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some time later i asked a friend from cell if i could join him on a night out, it felt safe enough to ask him as he was a brother of a school friend, he was going to be meeting up with some of his friends.......that night i met my husband.......he had recently attended a church service at the baptist church......invited by the same friend i was out with.....</div>
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around two years later we were married, we moved over the mountain and away from the life we knew to start our life together......</div>
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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for a while we travelled to church and were part of a cell group which met in our area......and then i met someone with a love for the Lord that was so strong that i couldn't help but want to be her friend....we worked at the same school and soon discovered that we even lived in the same complex......they had recently left their church and were attending a home church; they invited us to join them.....</div>
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here we were guided to believe that the only Word that was important was the Word of God.....and so there were no prepared sermons.......we read straight out of the Bible and discussed what we read....it was here that we learnt that we needed to abide in Christ.......that His Spirit was already abiding in us.....and we listened as the Spirit within those around us taught us and revealed Christ to us.....</div>
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<b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">draw near to me, for I'll draw near to you</span></i></b></div>
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the Body that surrounded us grew and changed often over the years......we met as a group of mixed ages with our young children crawling among us as we worshipped......as the children grew older we gathered together as adults only while parents took it in turns to teach the children.....we met as a Body in the morning, we met at night, bringing young ones along and including them in the fellowship at times......the younger generation felt led by the Lord to begin fellowshipping together with our children in the mornings, while the older generation felt a need to gather together at night.......sometimes we'd congregate all as one.......some have left, some have stayed.......some come often, some come when they feel led to......but we are all still part of the Body.......</div>
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when i look back over the years i can clearly see how the Lord has quietly been drawing me near all of my life......He has removed the need for the security from routines, He has made a home within me to worship Him, He has led me to a place of rest where i can be myself while i abide in Him, He has made me part of a Body hungry to be in unity with Him......</div>
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i believe that everyone can know Christ, i believe that when you choose to believe in Him His Spirit becomes yours and He will gently lead you, i believe that we are now living in a time when we no longer need one person to stand in front of church to preach the Word to bring new revelations.......i believe the Word lives within and He can teach you bringing you into Truth.......and when you gather together with like-minded believers to encourage one another, the words He has whispered to you will be confirmed......</div>
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<i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;">Hebrews 8 vs 10 This is the covenant I will make with the house of Israel after that time, declares the Lord. I will put my laws in their mind and write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. No longer will a man teach his neighbour, or a man his brother, saying, 'Know the Lord,' because they will all know me, from the least to the greatest, For I will forgive their wickedness and I will remember their sins no more."</span></b></i><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-6679415538552824222012-11-20T02:35:00.000-08:002013-08-19T10:49:52.054-07:00how we got here (part one)......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
i thought that He was asking me to sacrifice, but instead He was asking me to receive........<br />
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in july of 2011 i was feeling like a ship being tossed between decisions again.......how was i to school our children? structure or no structure?<br />
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i searched the Word of God for anything and everything on planning, wanting to know what He said, needing to do what He wanted.......<br />
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Psalm 33 vs 10 The Lord brings the counsel of the nations to nought, <b>He makes the thoughts and the plans of the people of no effect,</b></span></i><br />
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;">Proverbs 16 vs 1-3 The plans of the mind and orderly thinking belong to man, <b>but from the Lord </b>comes the wise answer of the tongue. All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirits (the thoughts and intents of the heart). <b>Roll your works upon the Lord (commit and trust them wholly to Him; He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and) so shall your plans be established and succeed.</b></span></i><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span"><i>journal entry: </i>He will give me what to say or do, just ask........commit and trust.......He will make His thoughts yours!!! and therefore your plans will succeed......</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;"><i>Proverbs 16 vs 9 A man's mind plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps and makes them sure</i></span><br />
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<i>journal entry: </i>Father-please direct my steps and make them <u>sure</u>!<br />
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in august i read:<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;"><i>Numbers 6 vs 24-26 The Lord bless you and watch guard, and keep you; The Lord make His face to shine upon and enlighten you and be gracious (kind, merciful, and giving favour) to you; The Lord lift up His [approving] countenance upon you and give you peace (tranquility of heart and life continually)</i></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #783f04;"><i>Psalm 22 vs 26 The poor and afflicted shall eat and be satisfied; they shall praise the Lord-they who [diligently] seek for,<b> inquire of and for Him, and require Him [as their greatest need].</b> May your hearts be quickened now and forever!</i></span><br />
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<i>journal entry: </i>Lord, please help me to know I'm teaching the right things/using the right things.<br />
<b>dream: </b>I dreamt I was driving the kids in a car we were all so happy......I was taking them to SVPS for school......oh boy!?!<br />
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that sunday at fellowship the Body of Christ prayed over me, not knowing that their words would break chains, just following the Spirit within.......speaking words which would speak to the Deep within me........<br />
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"expect the unexpected! my identity is in Christ not in being my children's mother/Ray's wife/teacher"</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"may you hear and know Jesus' voice clearly, that i would know why He created me-my purpose"</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"don't make decisions out of fear"</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"i don't need to be what people said i was in the past"</span></i></div>
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in my spirit i knew what He was saying to me........i knew which direction He was leading me to,</div>
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i went home and searched the internet for a site.........a friend had been updating it and i thought that it would be there......it wasn't.......no, not that one........the other.........surely not Lord?........and so i submitted and googled the other....the one i had dared to say never to......never say never,</div>
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for two days i wrestled with what He was saying......</div>
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<i>journal entry: </i>Am I still afraid of the kids going to school? for different reasons now.....I'm afraid I'll loose their hearts. That I won't be able to build our relationship.</div>
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My mind races ahead when I think He's saying something and it starts to plan.......plan ways of me coping.</div>
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It doesn't matter what other people think.....I need to do what He is saying. Psalm 23 The Lord is my Shepherd</div>
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a day later i was still wrestling....</div>
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<i>journal entry</i>: mind still racing. Worrying that Jenna won't cope with the 2 o' clock day.....I want to protect her emotionally and physically.......I need to hand this burden over. Father please make your thoughts, my thoughts. Guide my steps onto your path and plan and purpose for my children. I always try to think ahead and plan-I struggle to rest and do what the Lord has told me. I keep on thinking how will it work out, what will the next step be? Why does He want us to do this? Lord, help me to rest and wait for your clear direction.......</div>
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a day later i was tired out from all of the wrestling, i hadn't shared it with Ray in hope that somehow, some way he would hear the same from the Lord and that He would have to make the decision......he would be the one needing to submit.......</div>
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and so when my precious husband saw me climb into bed to hide away from the decision.....when he saw my tired and weary face he gently asked: what is wrong?</div>
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and the walls broke down and i wept.......i think He is wanting Jenny to go to school.......i shared what i had heard, what i had read and as i did His thoughts became mine, His plan became mine......as my heart turned from sadness to joy........i slowly started to accept what He wanted me to receive.....His ways and not mine,</div>
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<i>journal entry: </i>Tomorrow is gymnastics <i>(at the school)</i> and I will need to pluck up my courage to ask for fees and an application form.......</div>
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needless to say it took me almost a week to ask for those forms.......i can be such a jonah sometimes ;-)</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0mC5ZldQCMeA7G4bT-rD_ajDDOt6ZyDQUzMfnUJNJrvm5vWA_Ps_sXW5XdbtXswbFd7NxelNo5GWYYBUehJ_eFBS7lncvULgFMIFbdfRAWvOBrgrkfubNK3dh-wTihulwMUbxnyEKgMQ/s1600/15092012048.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0mC5ZldQCMeA7G4bT-rD_ajDDOt6ZyDQUzMfnUJNJrvm5vWA_Ps_sXW5XdbtXswbFd7NxelNo5GWYYBUehJ_eFBS7lncvULgFMIFbdfRAWvOBrgrkfubNK3dh-wTihulwMUbxnyEKgMQ/s640/15092012048.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He will lead you beside still waters.</td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-89926526774140092912012-11-15T10:20:00.002-08:002013-03-17T12:45:16.166-07:00the naked truth<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
this year i am so thankful to have attended gym classes, not only have i discovered that i have discipline to exercise my body, but i have also rekindled a joy for exercising.........<br />
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one of my favourite parts has been having a sauna at the end of a training session.......<br />
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to have a sauna i strip off all of my clothes and then i walk into a small enclosure with other woman, who are naked themselves......<br />
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now, although my precious husband adamantly states that he loves my body, it is not the same one which he married more than a decade ago, the same one i long to have again........on my insecure days,<br />
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soon after starting at the gym i noticed that my friend's mother-in-law was coming at the same time as me, she enjoys time in the sauna too........<br />
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the sauna door is made of glass and if i enter the shower area i can easily see who i will be sharing this small enclosure with,</div>
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i found that if there were complete strangers in the room that it was very easy for me to strip down and walk in, however, if my f-m-i-l was there it was a different story.......i would change my destination and enter into the steam room.....<br />
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one day i dared to ask the Lord, why?<br />
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you're afraid she'll notice your flaws......yes, but why only with this person whom i know, why do i feel comfortable to get naked in front of strangers?<br />
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and then He dug deeper.......you do this in your friendships too........it was true i did, and it was something which had bothered me in the past before.......<br />
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i had realised, a while back, that i found it easy to share personal struggles with new acquaintances, people whom i was just getting to know, who I didn't see often..........it had bothered me: why couldn't i share with people who were supposed to be my closest friends?<br />
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and then He gently whispered: you're afraid they won't love you.........<br />
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rejection hurts, and in the past it has caused me to build a wall.....don't let anyone see the real me, the ugly me, fat and all.......it was easier to share with relative strangers because they hadn't dared yet to commit to a friendship with me, it was more difficult to share with my closer friends because i feared that if they saw the real me they would walk away......stop loving me,<br />
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and this is when He guided me, gently with His rod.........it is time to share the naked truth of who you really are,<br />
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why?<br />
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if other's do not see your weaknesses they will not see My strength, they will not see My renewing, restoring power........<br />
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rest in Me, I accept you as you are, I will never leave you nor forsake you........<br />
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since then i have spent many restful sauna sessions with this lovely generous women,<br />
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and so now it is time for me to become naked with you.......<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF-zDzt-bz9Y7ftnLne9dhWS_q0FYLCsCB7a-uZ-kbqcuDsMxMJjQrGafmEtTQ2VVYZXzYO_eX4zPQeKFb5-2KshN-4STVYy1_a2ipcW2d3872P295rYXNOLkCyeU5_CuycOgdAh9DL_s/s1600/13012012185.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF-zDzt-bz9Y7ftnLne9dhWS_q0FYLCsCB7a-uZ-kbqcuDsMxMJjQrGafmEtTQ2VVYZXzYO_eX4zPQeKFb5-2KshN-4STVYy1_a2ipcW2d3872P295rYXNOLkCyeU5_CuycOgdAh9DL_s/s400/13012012185.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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you will have noticed that I have switched off all comments-this is because i do not want to seek your approval anymore........i am choosing to believe that it is not in the approval of other's that i will find love........but rather it is in His Love that I have found approval,<br />
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i want to share with you the Love that the Lord has shown me.......and so when He leads I will follow, trusting that the green pastures He leads me to will bring refreshment and Life to your soul......as He has to mine......</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-11960355407872238932012-11-09T11:02:00.000-08:002013-03-17T12:45:16.136-07:00It's been a year........<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
and what a roller coaster one it's been........<br />
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in the beginning I struggled to let go, I wrestled with my thoughts........oh yes, there was underlying peace, but all my thoughts had to be realigned, renewed to focus on what He was saying to me,</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Jen's first school outing, so excited! </td></tr>
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I thought it was my purpose to teach them and guide them to discover who they are.......and then He whispered:Trust me with them, let me be their Shepherd, their Teacher......and so we stepped out in faith,<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">After the first term Mike started play school, it took two full terms before I could let go fully and let him go everyday-the Lord is so patient!!</td></tr>
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when my eyes are on Him, remembering His promises: I will never leave you nor forsake you.........your paths I will make straight, your thoughts will become mine........then it is easy.....<br />
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but the times when I have picked up the burden again, when I look around and compare....or I think that it is my role to make sure that they get the best of everything, or think that the purpose is gaining knowledge and experiences......</div>
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when I forget that the purpose is knowing Him......then I struggle in my own strength</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo8_52v4mrr_gCZh4rFa0zE1NeMYRa4sKIDqO2wLsCDsZ7vMHsvRf8pnK63hhgrXqf3vWwV6WG5W4Y2w2MbZUHOd56KBmaOFiv17E60lLyMvFIIbb4PIc-wnpRuE2e9_I4r2oo_8XvpEQ/s1600/335-001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo8_52v4mrr_gCZh4rFa0zE1NeMYRa4sKIDqO2wLsCDsZ7vMHsvRf8pnK63hhgrXqf3vWwV6WG5W4Y2w2MbZUHOd56KBmaOFiv17E60lLyMvFIIbb4PIc-wnpRuE2e9_I4r2oo_8XvpEQ/s400/335-001.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">we have learnt that He provides even before we ask</td></tr>
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I thought that if I encouraged them to discover who they are, what their dreams were, where their talents lay that they would find purpose........now I know that their purpose is to know Him and in getting to know Him they will discover who they truly are........His children, created to be in relationship with the One who loves them more than I can......to bring Him glory while walking in His freedom.......not to focus on discovering self, but to focus on discovering Him....<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVKbrKlyN_AvayEJgnLC2Tsshu2HRQOhidYOnJ_8gDY_FO8qN8EC5poAkeJLTcRqFtVelWpa6IKZsYW_nz8yYq8IMu-2ljI6RIGQyjO0FtTO17kli_l2oYyOQSo15d6Et2tSXP3zUpAfg/s1600/Fish+Hoek-20120220-00125.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVKbrKlyN_AvayEJgnLC2Tsshu2HRQOhidYOnJ_8gDY_FO8qN8EC5poAkeJLTcRqFtVelWpa6IKZsYW_nz8yYq8IMu-2ljI6RIGQyjO0FtTO17kli_l2oYyOQSo15d6Et2tSXP3zUpAfg/s400/Fish+Hoek-20120220-00125.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">it has been a busy year filled with concerts, pushing me out of my comfort zone</td></tr>
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and all the while that He has been renewing my thoughts I have fallen more in love........more in love with Him, more in love with my husband, more in love with my children.......more in love with Life,<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">my handsome Prince of Justice, such a blessing to watch him grow this year</td></tr>
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submitting to His way is not easy for me when I live by laws-I must do.......to be a good mom, wife, friend, daughter .......I fail often under laws,<br />
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submitting to His ways is not easy when I live life in my strength.....I am weak, and my strength is like a tiny spark compared to the fire which burns when He leads.......</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">my beautiful Princess of Joy and Life, every moment must be experienced...</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ekuXDu3YPhcXT1vaW6c81Qtob0YKwqgdItuQIfzyYgTKXb5bNa31pSr5jIdhMKSPsuzlspdiAigCBpUKUHeaJe6-JPvGP5q_jizF2STPmgpDCzf_SmJo2WVxhKsH7Vu0eZ5hqmAUbqM/s1600/Image0092.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ekuXDu3YPhcXT1vaW6c81Qtob0YKwqgdItuQIfzyYgTKXb5bNa31pSr5jIdhMKSPsuzlspdiAigCBpUKUHeaJe6-JPvGP5q_jizF2STPmgpDCzf_SmJo2WVxhKsH7Vu0eZ5hqmAUbqM/s400/Image0092.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">every experience is enjoyed!</td></tr>
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so when I am strong in Him and I submit to His ways, relying on His strength.........trusting His Word, resting in what He has revealed to us.......knowing that He will continue to complete the good work He has begun, then I walk in freedom trusting that my children will follow........not because I taught them, but because He has........</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-81715177324286676812011-11-04T12:34:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:45:16.158-07:00While we wait.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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We're shifting gears and finding new truths about ourselves.</div>
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Discovering who we are without labels and expectations.</div>
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Enjoying just being.</div>
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Learning about waiting and believing. </div>
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Our Father's timing is perfect, after all.</div>
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And while we wait and rest in His Light......</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0rQ1AHq_3Q9_j0ANmG8a9y5NOt46HEMubWjDvv7hpRI49LzmUF0O1uUY-P2aw4IY9vD4Yq9xhC54rJK5iX6tMWjwFvJ1d1mfH_BXHY1fEXy05P7fYoBkVZUuOB9miUyq2GJU2ZhUj6VQ/s1600/IMG_6005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0rQ1AHq_3Q9_j0ANmG8a9y5NOt46HEMubWjDvv7hpRI49LzmUF0O1uUY-P2aw4IY9vD4Yq9xhC54rJK5iX6tMWjwFvJ1d1mfH_BXHY1fEXy05P7fYoBkVZUuOB9miUyq2GJU2ZhUj6VQ/s640/IMG_6005.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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I am discovering the beauty of my creator.</div>
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For He never meant for me to be like you,</div>
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He asked that I seek Him and His ways. </div>
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His Word came to set me free.</div>
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Somehow it feels like I've been set free from something......and yet everything has a purpose in my life.</div>
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You see, I'm still learning that when I look into His Light,</div>
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When I cease to compare,</div>
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when I stop looking for answers from others,</div>
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and when I keep looking to Him for the paths on which to journey, </div>
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they may seem to change often,</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitllyvffMzJt4LSLjVikBsQu1RfiPs2kMyXPXdBU0vR0jRvgWPBS6WniXcsS3I-kiBsp-sF28H9FKJPFvd7u6oo6_H72kZhGk1DTy6HTqePPAOKLOlIQE3-hcbomW6cjogfOgkqlDgjns/s1600/IMG_7269.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitllyvffMzJt4LSLjVikBsQu1RfiPs2kMyXPXdBU0vR0jRvgWPBS6WniXcsS3I-kiBsp-sF28H9FKJPFvd7u6oo6_H72kZhGk1DTy6HTqePPAOKLOlIQE3-hcbomW6cjogfOgkqlDgjns/s640/IMG_7269.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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or sometimes just slightly, </div>
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but it's always exciting journeying with Him. </div>
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And as long as I keep holding His hand and looking into His face,</div>
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He will still be there guiding me, never leaving, never forsaking.</div>
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And in His freedom I can be truly free to be the me He created me to be.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-77545825983465037172011-09-26T10:54:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:50:45.017-07:00A relaxed Nature Club.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Although everyone in our Nature Club is very committed and nine times out of ten we have all four families there, last week found us having to change plans at short notice due to two families having other engagements.</div>
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So I thought it might be nice to take advantage of the great weather we had and we headed to Dale Brook Tidal pool to (hopefully) catch a glimpse of the whales in the bay.</div>
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WARNING: when heading towards Kalk Bay in a car, the entrance to the parking lot has changed it's position. Don't drive past it like me and end up having to park far away from your planned destination!</div>
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Hopefully the road works will soon be finished.</div>
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When we met our friends in the parking lot this was our view.</div>
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More evidence that spring has sprung.</div>
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Beautiful.</div>
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A short distance from this parking lot, heading back towards Cape Town, you will find some steps which lead to this beautiful treasure along our coast line.</div>
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Dale Brook Tidal pool.</div>
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Not too sure why I didn't pack in costumes that day.</div>
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I remembered everything but the costumes! Why is it always one thing that gets left behind?!</div>
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Not minding that they were without costumes the children quickly stripped down to their underwear and ran with squeals of delight towards the pool.</div>
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Our rocks are not white here in South Africa-these were probably painted during a spring low tide.</div>
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Although they are not natural they add to the beauty of the surroundings. </div>
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The water was cold and it was at quite a high level. You could just see the wall dividing the water in the pool from the vast expanse of sea beyond the wall.</div>
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It took me a while to catch this photo, and it still doesn't show you how awesome the waves were crashing over the pool wall.</div>
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The view towards Kalk Bay Harbour.</div>
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The view from the safety of the pool side.........she just can't wait to be big enough to join those three crazy kiddies playing in the water!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHdJG3PG9OQZYWwL4UyKqzhp1p-H2uG8zCsDkVL2mC3-S0ysHLLtnzN9bHoo3Gt2XUlS7hTNQtI3zm-SxI7vA7rc72Z_zIFYAQtQBKwa5cy0wpoaRWKEjPm6UimtcqSXf4kjKGD-u1ArQ/s1600/Picture+205+%25282%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHdJG3PG9OQZYWwL4UyKqzhp1p-H2uG8zCsDkVL2mC3-S0ysHLLtnzN9bHoo3Gt2XUlS7hTNQtI3zm-SxI7vA7rc72Z_zIFYAQtQBKwa5cy0wpoaRWKEjPm6UimtcqSXf4kjKGD-u1ArQ/s640/Picture+205+%25282%2529.jpg" width="480" /></a></div>
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And then finally the view we all had been waiting for.</div>
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A Southern Right Whale waving it's flipper at us.</div>
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These whales return here every year at this time to give birth to their calves.</div>
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In fact, one had been spotted last week which had just given birth near this spot!</div>
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So after seeing what we had come to see and after a glorious time in the pool we headed off for some more exploring.</div>
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A quick stop to watch the road works. What fun for the big machine loving boys-we even got to see a digger which was precariously trying to balance on a mound of sand. It quickly let down it's stabiliser's to help it to balance, much to the delight of our boys.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhia4xfEQlBD-QCktkMKGsJUhsq9JNV_T00Y0-n0E6FeE3Jz2oxqsDSoKsb6K1dhQ_OcrrVRkHWZS4sKIFFc6idWTRMeJ1_tDUM6IjXM8iQIfshT3Dnqw4AkmKyhQH2FYf0UGjG4jaDC3s/s1600/IMG_7123.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhia4xfEQlBD-QCktkMKGsJUhsq9JNV_T00Y0-n0E6FeE3Jz2oxqsDSoKsb6K1dhQ_OcrrVRkHWZS4sKIFFc6idWTRMeJ1_tDUM6IjXM8iQIfshT3Dnqw4AkmKyhQH2FYf0UGjG4jaDC3s/s320/IMG_7123.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Just opposite the Dale Brook pool you'll find the Shark Center.</div>
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I've wanted to pop in there for some time so I thought we'd do that on this particular day.</div>
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Inside a very friendly, shark loving guy invited us to look inside their fish or rather, shark tank.</div>
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We had fun finding some of the secrets hiding in the water.</div>
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Can you spy the shark's egg here? It's often called a mermaid's purse.</div>
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There are some lovely books and dvd's on sale there and they kindly offered for us to watch one of the dvd's in their upstairs room.</div>
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I'm not sure what this little man enjoyed more, the dvd or the plastic shark toys?</div>
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A lovely morning, once again, spent with our nature club friends.....well some of them.</div>
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No matter how small the group is it's still fun to get out into nature with our friends.</div>
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And the good news is we'll be returning to a nearby beach this week with everyone from the club.</div>
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Perhaps we'll be lucky enough to catch another glimpse of our whale friend!</div>
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Our nature fun for the day didn't end there though.</div>
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When we returned home we found a very nervous Charity who had had her own nature experience!</div>
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This little slug eater has probably been in our cupboard all winter.</div>
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(good thing we're busy doing spring cleaning!)</div>
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It was busy shedding it's skin when we found it. </div>
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And of course this little man was only too eager to adopt it.</div>
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It took a bit of convincing to get him to agree that we couldn't keep it as a pet!</div>
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This post features on the South African Carnival of Homeschool Bloggers where South African home schoolers share experiences, ideas, philosophies and much more. You can join the carnival too by heading to the <a href="http://www.hayesfamily.co.za/blog/?page_id=10003" target="_blank">South African Carnival of Homeschool Bloggers sign up page.</a> In the meantime, head to <a href="http://karensclan.blogspot.com/2011/09/sach-carnival-8-co-ops-and-support.html" target="_blank">SACH Carnival #8 - Co-ops and Support Groups</a> for this week's carnival. We hope you enjoy the carnival as much as we have!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-31117338079192803072011-09-26T05:26:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:54:41.953-07:00Revisiting the museum in Heritage week.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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On Saturday we celebrated <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heritage_Day_(South_Africa)">Heritage Day</a> here in South Africa.</div>
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Last week the <a href="http://www.iziko.org.za/">Iziko Museums</a> kindly opened their doors to the public allowing everyone free entry to any of their museums.</div>
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Feeling a little guilty that we hadn't been to many museums this year (what is it with this mother's guilt!?) I decided to take advantage of the opportunity to visit the Natural History Museum in Cape Town.</div>
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We'd been there two years ago when Michael was a two year old. So I knew this would be a totally different experience for both of the kids.</div>
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Of course Jenna, with her memory like an elephant, never forgot that it was the place we had seen the dinosaur displays. So she was super excited to return.</div>
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I love the road that leads you past the <a href="http://www.sa-venues.com/attractionswc/company-gardens.htm">Company Gardens</a> on your way to the museum. It's looking beautiful with all of the old oak trees dressed in their new green leaves.</div>
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On our previous visit the main attraction had been the dinosaurs and the whales.</div>
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As the kids had been quite a bit younger then we didn't walk through the whole museum. </div>
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Now that they're a bit older their concentration and interest can be held a bit longer.</div>
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So I decided we'd start at the bottom and work our way to the top.</div>
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Our first stop was the section which classically houses the "before white man" history.</div>
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It is filled with scenes about the Zulus, Bushmen and other African tribes which inhabited our beautiful land before it was discovered.</div>
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It was a wonderful, gentle way of teaching the kids about our land's history. Everything is laid out before them and they asked questions or I pointed out items which I thought they could relate to or would interest them.</div>
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Although admittedly I don't think that our museum has much of a wow factor. (I visited the Natural History Museum and Science Museum when I went to England and I still think this particular museum could be made more interactive for children.) It has improved since our last visit, so perhaps we'll catch up someday!</div>
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Of course the kids are non the wiser and so there were many oohs and aahs coming from them.</div>
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Especially in the Sea section.</div>
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I convinced Jenna to stand in the whale's mouth-but Michael was not keen on being swallowed up like Jonah!</div>
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I don't blame him when you see these creatures face to face they are rather overwhelming!</div>
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Listening to their sounds, in the whale sound box, was a little scary for them too, but they were very intrigued by that experience.</div>
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There was no convincing Mikey to enter these shark jaws!</div>
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But perhaps because he knows these are extinct, I finally managed to convince him to have a photo with the dinosaurs :-)</div>
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Sadly it seems we haven't had many dinosaurs discovered here in South Africa so there aren't many bones to see which is what Jenna was hoping for.</div>
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She had prepared a clipboard to take along on which to record all of the dinosaurs and who had discovered them. We couldn't really find that specific info. Thankfully she wasn't put off by the lack of info and just simply enjoyed discovering each new display-even the gory ones!</div>
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We did get to see a poster explaining fossilisation, which tied in nicely with our recent visits to the <a href="http://ourjourneyinhim.blogspot.com/2011/08/walk-in-wetlands.html">wetlands </a>and our lessons on sandstone and rock formation.</div>
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And we saw a short display by one of the museum aides who was demonstrating how they remove the bones from the hard rock.</div>
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After all of that learning it was time to get rid of some energy outdoors.</div>
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As Jen put it: Mom, I've had enough of this place, please can we leave now?</div>
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Time for learning done.........time for play to begin!</div>
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Does anybody know where all of the fish have gone to in the pond?</div>
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We shared our lunch with the friendly squirrels.........they come up very close to you.</div>
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Once Michael almost had one eating out of his hand.</div>
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After a walk through the gardens we passed the National Art Gallery.</div>
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I was surprised that the kids wanted to go inside and even more surprised to see that entrance was free that day as well!</div>
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My kids constantly amaze me simply by what grabs their interest.</div>
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Walking around the gallery Michael was intrigued by a photograph display and took himself off on his own guided tour.</div>
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Then we discovered Tretchikoff's art work .</div>
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They had a display case housing the original dress worn by the "blue faced Chinese lady".</div>
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We turned our art tour into a quick scavenger hunt as we walked through the halls of the gallery hunting for the painting in which the dress had been painted. Finding the painting was easy, but getting Jenna to agree that it was the same dress wasn't as easy. I guess she was right though-afterall, the original dress was blue not yellow. A classic opportunity for teaching an artist's license to interpret the world as he sees it!</div>
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And then they asked to watch the documentary on Tretchikoff's life........like I said, it amazes me what intrigues them. They sat as still as mice watching the movie, which I thought was totally above their level. Just goes to show we should never underestimate what our children are capable of or rule out the topics which would interest them!</div>
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So I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that after all of that culture and stillness that they would have needed to move.</div>
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But perhaps the bannisters of the art gallery are not the best place for children to climb?!</div>
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Perhaps that's why they created the interactive art work out doors where they found a place to use up some energy turning the wheels to make the little lion and man move?!</div>
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But before Michael decided to make that into a jungle gym too we used up that pent up energy with a long walk back to our car.</div>
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And when we got home this is what they got up to...........</div>
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Bushmen in their little skirts adorned with necklaces and armed with digging sticks. Oh and the panties on the head? That's supposed to be the short curly hair. (She doesn't have a black pair ;-)</div>
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I just love it when they recreate their learning experiences through creative play!</div>
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Thanks Iziko Museum for the inspiration.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-39486163775933067772011-09-25T14:22:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:30:46.442-07:00Week-ends are for family.....and friends.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I think we can definitely say our final good-byes to winter.....spring seems to have decided to stick around for at least four of the seven days in a week.</div>
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Saying good-bye to winter means we say good-bye to hockey for Ray and hello to cycling and training for the Argus Cycle race.</div>
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This year Ray decided to return to the hockey field after a little break.</div>
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Most week-ends the kids and I tried to tag along to watch.......or rather they would ride, make new friends or just explore the grounds while I sat huddled in the car trying to read or watch the game!</div>
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We all enjoyed these days. And although I will confess that I'm no more clued up on hockey rules than I was since he last played, our children's interest in ball sports has definitely grown.</div>
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Proving that it is often when we as parents share our love and interests with our children that their interests are ignited.</div>
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As crazy as it may sound we went swimming in winter, and that's only because</div>
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we were blessed with a week-end away with Ray's folks at Montague Springs.</div>
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I, who will admit to not being a water baby, was even tempted to enter into the warm baths.</div>
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Of course the kids and Ray spent most of their time in the warm water despite the icy cold air which wrapped around you when you eventually ventured out again.</div>
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I was amazed at how much the kid's swimming has progressed since last summer-I think this may just be the summer we will get to throw away all swimming aids.</div>
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Jenna even surprised us by going down the super tube, once ;-) Perhaps next time she'll convince Mikey!</div>
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Now I'm really looking forward to summer days filled with swimming.</div>
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That's the kids, not me by the way......yes, I really am that bad at getting into the pool!</div>
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At the start of spring we celebrated my neice's second birthday at the Barnyard.</div>
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And that is when Jenna got to ride on a pony for the second time in her life.</div>
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She was so excited to ride on the pony. Not once, not twice but three times-thanks Aunty Susan for organising extra tickets-you made her day!</div>
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While she waited in between rides Mikey and her had such fun in the carousel. They've wanted to have a carousel ride forever so lots of little wishes were answered that day.<br />
Jenna's excitement about riding soon rubbed off on Mikey and after initially declining a ride he proudly mounted the little pony.....<br />
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To those who don't know him this may look like an unhappy scowl but actually it's his: I'm really proud-but-don't-want-to-show-it smirk........we just missed catching the toothy grin which followed. He couldn't hide his pride for long :-)</div>
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Winter has finally come to an end and, I may be a little too soon here, but I think I have smelt summer blooming already.</div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;">a surfer girl in the making</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;">(thanks for the wet suit Rach!)</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;">sandcastles are so much fun when built with your friends</span></i></div>
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Could that be because our week-ends are once again filled with braais and beaches with friends and family?</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-73992413116979735472011-09-25T11:07:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:50:45.012-07:00The Scout (Nature) club????<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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This Nature Club happened a few weeks ago but I just have to share some of the pictures with you!</div>
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We drove around the coast, on the Scarborough side, to a picnic spot in a forest near Red Hill Pottery Studio-I hope those directions are clear enough for you, sorry I can't remember the name right now;-)</div>
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Underneath the shade of the tall pine trees our little nature clubbers got to practice some scouting survival skills.</div>
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First they had to collect kindling for a fire.</div>
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They soon discovered the pine needles and thought they would make great kindling.</div>
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(even though some of their collection was green-we left it up to nature to teach them what would happen when you put green leaves onto a fire).</div>
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And then they got to light the fire!</div>
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It was very interesting watching the experienced Daddy's-little-braai-helper's teach their friend's just how to do the job properly!</div>
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When the fire was all ablaze it was time to hunt for a sturdy stick and some more pine needles to use to create a broom. So off they went in search of sticks while I was left to man their fire.</div>
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Soon they were racing back to get their little hands busy broom making.</div>
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They learnt how to lash their leaves onto the stick to create the broom.</div>
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Lots of co-ordination needed here!</div>
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After successfully making their brooms they had great fun sweeping the site clean.</div>
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Then the big girls got rolls ready for lunch time because we were going to cook eggs on the fire in orange peels!</div>
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Yip, you read correctly.</div>
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Eggs cooked inside orange skins on the fire.</div>
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Want to know how?</div>
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First halve your orange.</div>
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Scoop out all the flesh.</div>
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Crack an egg into the "egg cup".</div>
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And then place your egg cup onto the coals.</div>
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Wait patiently while the egg cooks.</div>
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Patiently, I said, because it does take rather long!</div>
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And then if you're a real rough-it kind of kid you'll taste the egg-even if it is covered in ash and tastes a little like orange :-)</div>
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Needless to say, although it is a great idea if you're stuck out in the wild with a only few oranges and some eggs to eat, it probably wouldn't be recommended by my rough-it kind of kids.</div>
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They preferred the marshmallows of course, but not done in mom's experimental banana split style!</div>
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After learning all those survival skills it was time to relax under the trees and gaze up at the branches high above us.</div>
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Another wonderful morning spent with our friends perfecting our survival skills and enjoying nature.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10150830393391182935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139829428606784124.post-8545683992433914702011-09-22T05:54:00.000-07:002013-03-17T12:54:41.987-07:00How do you encourage creativity?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Have you ever read about the <a href="http://www.multipleintelligencetheory.co.uk/">Multiple Intelligence Theories</a>?</div>
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I love that it smashes the theory of the old IQ tests and encourages you to see that people can be intelligent in different ways,</div>
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after all......</div>
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everyone of us was created to be different, weren't we?</div>
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When I look at my children and their unique personalities I stand in awe of how God created them so differently.</div>
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I used to feel guilty about not doing art projects with Jenna every week.</div>
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She loves to create....... almost everyday there's some new project in the making.</div>
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Then I realised that I didn't have to teach her how to be creative, she already is.</div>
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All I had to do was expose,</div>
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provide and </div>
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encourage!</div>
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I may not be creative in the traditional sense of the word.......but I am a creative thinker.</div>
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Give me an <i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">organisational problem</span></span></i> to solve and I'll do my best to find the most practical way to make it work.</div>
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So in our home creativity is not encouraged by regular art lessons by mom, and I no longer feel guilty about it!</div>
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At times it is encouraged out of a desire.....</div>
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She wanted a crown,</div>
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so she created one.</div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I make art and craft materials easily available to her so that when she feels inspired she can just create.</span></span></i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5BYZ-FKaYvETA-VZQNof6H0d86baiPLsDlARD9a4flFW_gtUm79AN1Tg64ERE43xYIb6MeC9Y3znpq1UEJiBjOHrlhaKmEwBZbyfFPTrMd2pV_LwIBs3J4_r7yzI8OmDVZPGvJh6afhU/s1600/IMG_6868.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5BYZ-FKaYvETA-VZQNof6H0d86baiPLsDlARD9a4flFW_gtUm79AN1Tg64ERE43xYIb6MeC9Y3znpq1UEJiBjOHrlhaKmEwBZbyfFPTrMd2pV_LwIBs3J4_r7yzI8OmDVZPGvJh6afhU/s400/IMG_6868.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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At times it starts off as creative play and then gets built on.....</div>
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a block t.v.</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;">I make sure toys are easily accessible too. Sometimes it helps to leave toys, which are not regularly played with, in the place of favourite toys. </span></span></i></span></div>
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At times she expresses herself creatively through dance.......</div>
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and manages to convince her brother to dance a part in the Nutcracker Ballet with her.</div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;">I make sure there's a variety of music playing sometime during the day.</span></span></i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTDipfK9_bGT3bmQi0s8EfjeUVxo7qzCgfC1gwO45ZBxPP-DyZXtwjFzE5u4fGAe9K1PRtEkINlwukM6aZKFe8g3L6zGUrUFVfwFXe2awyHnSbPQvHVCTLA8STQK-vnoiB8Gk4ZutXyw0/s1600/IMG_6890.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTDipfK9_bGT3bmQi0s8EfjeUVxo7qzCgfC1gwO45ZBxPP-DyZXtwjFzE5u4fGAe9K1PRtEkINlwukM6aZKFe8g3L6zGUrUFVfwFXe2awyHnSbPQvHVCTLA8STQK-vnoiB8Gk4ZutXyw0/s400/IMG_6890.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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At times she gets inspired by dvd's she's watched.....</div>
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then out come the face paints and dress up clothes.</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I recognise that she is a visual learner and that she also relaxes by watching dvd's. Buying a new dvd or borrowing from friends, makes sure she has time to unwind from all that creative thinking!</span></i></span></div>
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At times she just has a vision inspired by recyclables and it must be created now!</div>
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After all, every princess needs a castle doesn't she?!</div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;">I store boxes etc. and supply different materials for construction.......even though it takes up so much space and can sometimes be a fleeting idea ;-)</span></span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;">(recycled creations is not my idea of fun, but I've let go of my need to declutter and throw away for the sake of her creative expression)</span></i></div>
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The bonus side of her creativity is that it often involves team work to create.</div>
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The castle needed some colour.</div>
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At times she just loves to be outdoors in creation.....</div>
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and that's enough to inspire a little bit of creative play.</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc; font-size: large;"><i>I've tried to encourage outdoor play and left my children to entertain themselves a lot........I've never wanted to hear: what can I do now mom?</i></span></div>
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At times the books she reads (or those which are read to her) inspire her to create.</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><i>I've shared my love of books with her by having reading times and books available around our home all the time.</i></span></span></div>
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<i>{Jesus baptising men in the river-she drew this while we were reading Bible stories one morning.... just something she wanted to do}</i></div>
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At times she gets inspired by beauty she see's around her....</div>
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and so she plans,</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiH7v71iAQBzbBskKtZV1yHWLFLyLoJtFz-njFmGtzJM_oNW6mbxi7WJkGyFh1f1EGd8pfETw6qhe0M2R9m8pfAtFi75sT5TaqwzFAVgzTu4KJvpsYM5K7WNP5zGuOB1dUX0nHq2zFcuio/s1600/IMG_6958.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiH7v71iAQBzbBskKtZV1yHWLFLyLoJtFz-njFmGtzJM_oNW6mbxi7WJkGyFh1f1EGd8pfETw6qhe0M2R9m8pfAtFi75sT5TaqwzFAVgzTu4KJvpsYM5K7WNP5zGuOB1dUX0nHq2zFcuio/s400/IMG_6958.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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and then she paints....</div>
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and draws.........a bird's view of it all.</div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #6fa8dc;">I sometimes set up our dining table for painting time while I prepare supper.....it's a peaceful activity at the end of a busy day </span></span></i></div>
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We're all gifted in different ways. </div>
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When it comes to arts and crafts I'm not going to be the first mom to offer you ideas for creative activities to do with your children.....</div>
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but I will encourage you to use your gifts to discover your child's unique abilities,</div>
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because being creative isn't just about arts and crafts!</div>
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